This member hasn't filled in the description.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, after months of dating, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take things to the next level. He told me that he couldn't have sex with me because of his religious beliefs. I would've been fine with this if it weren't for the fact that I know he and his family are all atheists. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26024) - you deserved it (2933)
On 01/04/2012 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Anon - United States (California)
Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27890) - you deserved it (4963)
On 12/16/2011 at 9:29pm - kids - by DocBastard (man) - Reserved
Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40177) - you deserved it (2607)
On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28752) - you deserved it (4076)
On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)
Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25277) - you deserved it (11772)
On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35970) - you deserved it (6095)
On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my girlfriend sent me a sexy picture of herself in my boxers. I thought it would be funny to take a picture of myself in the thong she left in my room and send it to her. She thought it would be funnier on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20440) - you deserved it (40773)
On 11/05/2011 at 3:25am - misc - by kdeeeceee - United States
Today, at the nail salon, a Korean woman was making fun of me. I kindly told her, in Korean, that I understood. She kindly told me, in English, that she didn't care. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34746) - you deserved it (2808)
On 11/03/2011 at 8:16pm - work - by EunJung - United States
Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24616) - you deserved it (10764)
On 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm - intimacy - by HOe HOe HOe (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36098) - you deserved it (2371)
On 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm - misc - by KaySchrages92 (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31553) - you deserved it (7627)
Today, my mom found a new way to get me to clean my room. She piled everything from my floor in front of my wardrobe and padlocked my dresser shut. The best part? She put the key in my room. The worst part? She put over a hundred decoys in there too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8419) - you deserved it (24430)
On 10/01/2011 at 7:45pm - misc - by Kazuya - Australia (Victoria)
Today, while taking a shower, my back hair caused so much friction against the bar of soap, it stuck for a good second before coming free. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13915) - you deserved it (6047)
On 10/01/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by soapy - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I used a public restroom with very shiny floors. So shiny, in fact, that I could see a clear reflection of the person in the next stall. I'm pretty sure they could see me too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21939) - you deserved it (1937)
On 10/01/2011 at 10:18am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6144) - you deserved it (44179)
On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
