The Top

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Cue "Once in a Lifetime" by Talking Heads

By Disoriented - 30/05/2026 15:00 - Germany

Today, my life is moving too fast. Just yesterday I was at college earning a small stipend, which felt like i could buy the world with. Suddenly, I'm married, with kids, and a house, and a negative balance the day after receiving my salary, just because my kids needed new shoes for school. How did I get here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 311

You deserved it 219

Somebody's watching

By KANE LIVES - 06/06/2026 22:00 - Switzerland - Zurich

Today, my son told me he liked a girl, so I asked if they were friends. He said no, he's never spoken to her, but he watches her in class and follows her around. When I told him that was fucking creepy, my wife yelled at me. My kid is a stalker and my wife thinks it's cute. God help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 69

YouTube crime degree

By Anonymous - 12/06/2026 03:00 - Canada - Fort Nelson

Today, I got contacted by an arm-chair detective do-gooder who was convinced my dad is a serial killer. I asked around and it turns out the do-gooder is actually prime suspect for a local murder and dismemberment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 365

You deserved it 62

Skittish

By Anonymous - 13/06/2026 22:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I've been into this guy at work forever, and we've been flirting more and more lately. Today he came up behind me, but I didn't see him. He said "Hi!" and scared me so bad that I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 90

What are your unpopular opinions?

By Anonymous - 25/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, during a work diversity seminar, everyone was asked to share “one unpopular opinion.” Thinking it would be funny, I admitted I actually enjoy replying-all to unnecessary company emails because I like the chaos. Nobody laughed. HR asked to “have a quick chat” afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 476

Harsh but fair

By Anonymous - 27/05/2026 03:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I didn’t get a job I wanted because my interviewer claimed the music he heard coming from my car showed I was clearly unsuited to their professional work environment. I’ve got young kids, it’s not my fault my playlists are littered with songs from Disney, cartoons, and anime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 116

Double life

By Anonymous - 28/05/2026 22:00 - United States - St. Cloud

Today, I found out the man (M 43) that I’ve (F 32) been seeing on and off for 5 or 6 years secretly got married two weeks ago. He was even at my job for an event a week ago and didn’t even tell me. This man took my first kiss and virginity. I even provided emotional support when his aunt and sister passed from cancer. Absolutely blindsided. FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 107

Self-esteem issues

By Anonymous - 07/06/2026 00:00 - United States

Today a cute coworker asked me out to lunch but I said no because I know how unattractive I am, and didn't think he wanted to be seen with me. He got really pissed and told me that I needed to work on my self-esteem. I just blew up something that could have been wonderful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 628

Formatting issues

By Anonymous - 08/06/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my university professor asked us to submit anonymous course feedback. I wrote three paragraphs criticizing his lectures. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd left my full name at the bottom of the page. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 515

Date night

By Clumsy bitch - 19/06/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I went on a date at a museum, I thought it would be low-pressure. It was going well until I leaned in to read a plaque, tripped, and nearly took down a rope barrier. My date caught me by the arm, asked if I was OK, then spent the next 10 minutes pretending not to notice I'd knocked over a gift shop display with my backpack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 269

Kinda weird

By ButWhy - 21/06/2026 03:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, my son is incapable of sleeping alone because my husband keeps co-sleeping with him, stating, "He's going to be a kid for only a little while." The same guy who forced me to stop co-sleeping with the same kid because, "Kids need to be independent." The hypocrisy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 71

Thanks, I hate it!

By Anonymous - 25/05/2026 12:00 - United States - Center Line

Today, I got my mom (who is a diabetic) a set of sugar-free chocolates for Mother's Day. Everything was fine on that day, and my mom decided to share them since I bought a good sized box. I was perfectly fine, but my mom had explosive diarrhea for the rest of the day. I'll never buy THOSE again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 104

Safety first

By Anonymous - 29/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, my parents had my little sister's birthday pool party at our house. My mom decided to tell all the guests that the pool was "just for decoration" and nobody would actually be allowed to swim in it. Cue a million screaming tantrums and my parents and even me receiving tons of hate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 113

Convoluted

By TheDivorceCameFromNoWhere - 14/06/2026 03:00 - Germany

Today, I give my everything to my family and husband. Every penny I earn, hot meals daily, a clean house, and love. Despite all this, my husband asked me why I am still alive and told me to go and die. On my birthday. All because I mildly offended his third cousin against a ridiculous request. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 75

Make it a double feature

By Anonymous - 27/05/2026 12:00 - United States - San Bernardino

Today, my husband declared that since our youngest son happened to be born on our anniversary, we no longer needed to celebrate. He reasoned that it would be “wrong” to make his special day about us. Truth is he’s just a cheap unromantic sod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 107

Time flies

By Jellyroll - 14/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I ordered custom birthday balloons online. The company printed my age as 82 instead of 28. The balloons arrived on the morning of the party, and there wasn't enough time to replace them. My guests spent the evening asking about my "remarkable longevity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 97

Daily grind

By well fuck - 17/06/2026 22:00 - Poland - Warsaw

Today, I got home from working 14 hours straight, went to take a dump, and fell asleep on the toilet. I woke up later on the floor, covered in shit and piss, with my alarm going off, an hour before I was due back at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 103

Impressive

By brainrot 2026 - 25/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I tried to impress coworkers by saying I “don’t really watch TV” because I mostly read books. Unfortunately, someone immediately asked what I’d been reading lately, and the only honest answer was celebrity memoirs and conspiracy theory forum posts online at 2 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66

You deserved it 534

Birthday girl

By Lisa - 27/05/2026 15:00 - United States - Hollywood

Today, a client refused to pay for the nails I spent nearly three hours doing, because apparently it's her birthday and "you don't pay for birthday nails." She refused to pay, and we locked her inside the salon. She threw a bitch fit and rolled on the ground like a worm, kicking and screaming until the cops arrived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 590

You deserved it 72

Busted

By Anonymous - 01/06/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend text me and told me to do something sexy because she was going to FaceTime me. I eagerly dropped my pants and started stroking it to get ready for her. As soon as I opened her call, she was standing with my wife. I literally got caught with my dick in my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 660

My special helper

By Ceara - 03/06/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my mom found my Rose Toy in the washer while doing my laundry. My parents are no longer paying for college and she “hopes I’m planning on seeking some employment” because I have 30 days to move out. When I told her I can’t live on my own on minimum wage, she replied, “You should have thought about that then.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 114

Sorry for your loss

By Anonymous - 10/06/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother died unexpectedly of a heart attack. To make matters worse, every time he thinks I’m not watching him, my husband has a Cheshire Cat grin on his face, and a few times I’ve even seen him dancing in happiness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 86

What goes around…

By Ironyman - 25/05/2026 22:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I took the piss out of my younger brother for spending money on “fake internet clothes” in video games. Last week I spent 3 hours researching the perfect ergonomic office chair and paid extra for “limited edition fabric.” I'm apparently one financial decision away from becoming the exact nerd I used to bully. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55

You deserved it 471

Imposter syndrome

By Useless - 05/06/2026 20:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I worked hard and brought few points to an important meeting at work. All of them were dismissed almost immediately. Now I feel an impostor fraud who gets paid for nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 80

BEEP BEEP BEEP

By Anonymous - 14/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I bought noise-canceling headphones because my neighbors are loud. The first night I wore them, I completely missed the sound of my smoke alarm battery dying. Instead of hearing a faint beep every minute, I woke up to six missed calls from my roommate asking why I wasn't answering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 260

You deserved it 105

You can't hide forever

By Anonymous - 16/06/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I needed a pee while my dad was painting the bathroom and of course he warned me to not touch the wet paint. I started to pee and for maybe the third time in my whole life I did a two stream piss; one into the bowl and one all over the wet paint. I’m writing this hiding in my treehouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 161

You deserved it 301

Take this seriously!

By well fuck u then! jst fail - 29/05/2026 15:00 - United States - Secaucus

Today, to help my fellow trainees, I made a very long post in the training Teams chat detailing every detail that tripped me up recently. One responded, "Sir this is a Wendy's" and they all bust up laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 130

You deserved it 310

Good grief

By Saddie - 04/06/2026 03:00 - Germany - Frankfurt am Main

Today, the man I loved broke up with me, because he felt like his feelings for me were not enough for a serious relationship. As much as I'm thankful that he didn't drag me along, this hurts like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 86

All fixed up

By Anonymous - 09/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Center Line

Today, after I was wrapping up a visit with my chiropractor, I nearly fell off his table onto my face when I missed a handhold trying to push myself upright. After getting up, I then bumped into a poster on the wall, nearly knocking it onto the floor. At least the chiropractor had a good sense of humor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 85

Now you know

By codenamevulture - 12/06/2026 22:00 - United States - New York

Today, it's been a few weeks now since I started dating a boy. A whole fairy tale relationship. He would write me poems and all that garbage. Today, we sat by a bonfire, and he randomly mentioned his three other girlfriends, and how I should accept them due to his family traditionally having cheating husbands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 70

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The Top

Today, I found out that my daughter has been stuffing my push-up bras and lipstick into her backpack, putting them on at school, and taking them off before she gets home. She's 9. The only reason I found out is because her teacher reported me to social services. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 668

You deserved it 5 427

Today, I went to the hospital due to extreme sickness. My boyfriend saw this as an opportune time to take another girl out since I was "otherwise preoccupied." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 641

You deserved it 2 399

Today, I had a dream that my ex-boyfriend had become a vicious serial killer and was hunting me down because I broke up with him. I don't know what scares me more: the way he hunted me in my sleep, or the fact that it wouldn't surprise me if it actually happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 046

You deserved it 3 889

Today, I was called a "whore," a "demon," a "piece of shit," and a "disrespectful bitch." All of this happened because I wouldn't let my mother-in-law borrow my car. This is a woman with multiple speeding tickets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 138

You deserved it 3 114

Today, my boyfriend doesn't know if he should break up with me because he loves me too much, or to stay with me and make me suffer. I have no clue as to what's going on in his head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 125

You deserved it 5 226

Today, I asked my parents if I could borrow one of their three cars for the second time this year. They said no, suggesting that maybe I should consider buying my own car. This would be fair, if it wasn't for my sister borrowing their cars several times a week, without any disapproval. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 134