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Hey guys op here again. I was so overtired that I couldn't quite put it together that one should in fact unfold a folding chair to properly use it. I should have made this clear, I suppose, based on the colossal backlash I've received. Thanks, all.

Quick Stop

By poopy pants - 08/04/2013 01:47 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 396

You deserved it 8 743

Don't out people, people

By Anonymous - 26/08/2019 00:01 - United States - New York

Today, I caught my half-sister stealing money from her mother's purse. Rather than risk getting in trouble, she told her uber-conservative mother that I've been seeing a girl. So now, I'm grounded for being gay, and she gets off the hook for stealing because she outed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 316

You deserved it 229

By Forgotten One - 15/10/2009 11:11 - France

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years decided to start an online blog about his life. He mentioned his cars, his friends and even his staff. I was never mentioned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 917

You deserved it 4 948

By holdengurl18 - 21/06/2011 04:46 - China

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 861

You deserved it 13 092

By Anonymous - 20/06/2011 05:45 - United States

Today, my husband bought me a bouquet of roses. They caused me to sneeze seven times in a row. That was the closest he's ever got me to an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 944

You deserved it 8 620

Great parenting

By VeryLoved - 28/04/2021 20:01 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, after a year of staying at home, I finally went out. I had a panic attack and couldn't breathe, so my mum decided to scream at me and slap me so I'd become "normal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 130

You deserved it 268

By J. Homen - 30/03/2013 22:22 - United States

Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 895

You deserved it 5 804

By unloved - 17/04/2012 14:54 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 764

You deserved it 2 753

It Wasn't Me, by Shaggy

By itwasntme - 07/09/2019 16:00

Today, we found out my brother in law cheated on my sister. Somehow they’ve blamed me for the whole incident. I don’t know the guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 813

You deserved it 141

Dream baby dream

By CJ. - 05/05/2021 20:01 - Canada - Montr?al

Today, I had to babysit a 9 year-old girl. I hadn't slept for almost 40 hours and fell half-asleep while sitting on her couch for two minutes. She asked me something, but I thought it was a dream and answered with, "Your mom's a hoe." When I woke up, I realized I'd said it out loud instead of in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 1 397

By secretpornstar - 13/06/2011 19:23 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend had been encouraging me to send him 'personal' videos was so he could sell them online to porn websites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 744

You deserved it 19 399

By Proudlyintp - 13/08/2010 06:07 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date for coffee. He was smart, good looking, and friendly. While we were talking about our respective families it became abundantly clear that I have heard these stories before. I realized that 6 months earlier I had been dumped by his brother after sleeping with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 983

You deserved it 34 351

proudlyintp tells us more.

proudlyintp 0

Sunday 15 August 2010 1:42

I am the OP and am going to clarify the original post because in trying to keep to the letter limit, the tenses got confusing. I originally dated the brother "A" for a month and half. He has a very common last name. After we finally slept together he immediately went missing, which happened to be before I could meet a large portion of his family. Now 6 months later on a different blind date with brother "B" we were talking about respective families. Almost immediately the stories started to ring very familiar. He was telling a story about his brother who worked for him and it became abundantly clear that I had heard the same story only from a different perspective. Since there is a yuck factor with dating brothers and I am not really into creating family drama needlessly I am bowing out.