The Top

No, it was real. It was at Oriole Park at Camden Yards, which is never at capacity. And the tickets were the southwest airline new cheap ones, I think maybe $50. I went to fan assistance to try to get my ticket, and they said that they didn't even know about it, and the sponsor (southwest) was only there to distribute the flight tickets, then left. I tried calling, and they kept thinking I was trying to get extras for family or something. But, it was not a fake, the tickets were legit.

By penguindude82 - 06/05/2012 07:38 - United States - Dallas

Today, I had a huge yard sale. Since I live in a good neighborhood, I decided to leave the stuff out tonight rather than pack it all in for only a few hours. The news didn't say anything about the impending severe thunderstorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 723

You deserved it 33 849

Dedicated to changing the climate

By Dolly - 21/09/2023 14:00

Today, I found out my new boyfriend owns, and regularly drives, a forty year-old, smog-spewing sports car. I asked him if he'd ever consider upgrading to electric for the sake of the environment. He said that we wouldn't work out, and that I should leave and lose his number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 292

You deserved it 1 783

A bug, not a feature

By is. - 08/04/2021 00:30

Today, I discovered that it is not, in fact, normal for ones hands to randomly stop working sometimes. I thought I was just clumsy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 115

Freakout

By LoLWut?? nd Why?? - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 752

You deserved it 48 225

LM308 fried

By Anonymous - 03/05/2012 21:17 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I finally found out what the horrible smell at work was. A rat had decided to make its home in our emergency exit sign and had been fried by the electricity. I now have to fix this. Hello scorched dead rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 355

You deserved it 2 087

Make it stop

By SpookyOne - 04/06/2022 16:00

Today, the grocery store next door has decided to renovate and put their bottle disposal machine right underneath my bedroom. Once it's full, usually right before closing at 10pm., the machine starts beeping non-stop. I'm already diagnosed with a bunch of sleep disorders, but good night I guess… FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 114

Subtle threat

By afraid - 26/09/2023 04:00

Today, my girlfriend has been playing SZA’s "Kill Bill" on repeat all day. I’m starting to get genuinely scared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 536

You deserved it 120

By monkeywrench - 01/05/2012 05:14 - United States

Today, I got some spam stating that I'd have no love life in the coming 10 years if I didn't reply to it. So, no different to the last 10 years then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 524

You deserved it 2 901

Compassion? At school?

By Anonymous - 14/04/2021 00:30 - United States

Today, my house caught fire right before I was supposed to present a school project. My teacher told me to, "just suck it up and do it anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 079

You deserved it 88

Forget me not

By Anonymous - 06/06/2022 00:00 - United States - Gardena

Today, my wife is upset at me for having to remind her of her responsibilities. She dropped the ball several times in the past, and she hates that I remind her to prepare for upcoming deadlines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 229

Classic kitten move

By Filly - 18/03/2025 12:00 - Romania

Today, I thought my new kitten had gotten out, so I roamed the streets in the pouring rain, screaming his name for hours. Eventually, my fiance called and said he was home from work. I cried that the cat was gone, and he said, "What do you mean? He's on my lap." FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 199

By veebenjoo - 28/06/2011 05:35 - United States

Today, I got asked out for the first time in my life. During a prank call. By a complete stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 935

You deserved it 4 323

In a hurry

By bubbles - 10/06/2022 16:00

Today, my husband got home from a date, since he can't wait for our divorce to go through on account of his cheating. I literally put off medical school for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 192

Looking cool

By Anonymous - 18/05/2014 04:48 - United States

Today, while lifeguarding, I slipped and fell from my chair and onto the cement. Embarrassed and actually quite hurt, I tried to climb back up to the chair, but it tipped. I fell half onto the cement half into the pool, just before the chair landed on top of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 890

You deserved it 6 096

By love_letter - 29/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a over a year broke up with me. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't written him a long letter about how much I love him, and that I'm so glad we're together and so glad that he promised he would always be there. He'll be getting it in a few days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 784

You deserved it 3 843

By booste - 18/10/2009 04:06 - Canada

Today, I was written up because my manager heard me insulting a customer. How did I insult her? I called her grandma. Who did I say this to? My grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 798

You deserved it 2 271

Rivalry

By Anonymous - 23/03/2025 03:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my two idiot boys beat the hell out of each other over a girl they both like. The poor girl isn’t even remotely interested in them, she’s had the same boyfriend for 6 years, and is marrying him next year. What idiots I raised, one has a broken finger and the other is missing teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 154

By HAIRY - 26/04/2012 20:23 - United States - Iowa City

Today, I was hanging out with some of my friends when I fell asleep. When I woke up, I found that they had shaved the F word into my arm. I don't know what is more disturbing: the fact that this is what my friends do for fun, or that I have enough arm hair to have four letters shaved into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 139

You deserved it 4 448

By pod - 25/06/2011 23:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend threw me into his pool. I had my phone and iPod in my pockets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 693

You deserved it 5 415

By IHateGroupProjects - 25/04/2012 13:25 - United States - Riverdale

Today, I've now received my 73rd email in two days about my masters group project on policy recommendations for security reform. One group member has helpfully rewritten everything, and our project is now titled "Zeus's Earthly Kingdom." It's due today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 417

You deserved it 2 837

By pinocchio - 24/06/2011 23:04 - United States

Today, during my honeymoon, my wife and I finally went scuba-diving. My nose was too big to fit in the face goggles, so I couldn't go. My wife went without me anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 311

You deserved it 8 213

This Charming Man

By Anonymous - 21/04/2021 14:00

Today, I explained to my man child of a boyfriend that we don't reuse dirty dishes. We have to wash them. He doesn't think it's gross and yelled at me, throwing the pan in the sink. Oh, he also refuses to wash dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 382

You deserved it 546

Timewaster

By DanielleinDC - 07/10/2023 17:30

Today, I learned my boss, the CEO of a multinational nonprofit, is so computer illiterate that he hadn't realized he could resize the File Explorer window on his computer, leading to days of delay of him getting work to my team, and a lot of unhappy notes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 602

You deserved it 114

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my ass decided that it was the perfect day to exhibit the diarrhea side-effect of medicine I'm taking. I definitely made a lasting impression on my interviewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 252

You deserved it 2 983

Today, I accompanied some friends to sign up for a gym. When we got there, the guy handed me a form, too. I said, "Oh, I'm not signing up." He replied, "Out of all of you, you need it the most." He then said he was also a nutritionist, and offered a consultation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 880

You deserved it 11 145

Today, my boyfriend decided he preferred his other girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 536

You deserved it 757

Today, when I crossed the street, I almost died because of a careless driver, but when I crossed it again on my way back, I got hit by a bicycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 307

Today, I called my ex-husband to tell him our daughter was missing (the police have since found her, she’s fine) and he told me not to bother him with shit like that, because she’s my responsibility since she chose to live with me after the divorce. He then hung up the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 662

You deserved it 266

Today, I was complaining to my best friend about my weird cousin and how annoying he is whenever I see him (which isn't often, thankfully). She replied, “Isn’t that my boyfriend you're talking about?” Turns out, yes. Yes, he is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 195

You deserved it 408