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Sorry it took so long to write back I didn't know my FML got posted :) Now to explain a little. It turns out his trail wasn't fair and the reason he was found guilty was because his cell mate made a deal to get out of being sentenced if he lied about my step father admitting to murdering someone. His da also turned out to be an alcoholic. There is no evidence connecting my step father of the murder and now we're working on getting him released :)

By sommmerrrr - 15/09/2013 04:12 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, I was at Walmart with my stepmom. We were about to check out when a little sweet-looking old woman came up and asked if she could get in front of us. Seeing as she only had two items in her hands we said yes. Her husband then came up with two carts full of stuff, condoms on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 802

You deserved it 6 033

sommmerrrr tells us more.

sommmerrrr 2

Sunday 15 September 2013 17:42

I didn't think this would be posted so fast! But thanks for all the comments, they made my stepmom and me laugh our butts off. But we just went into a different line. Wasn't that big of a deal. But the granny didn't even say thank you! It was a little awkward seeing as they were so old but we still let that grandpa get in front of us. But thanks again for the comments guys!

By Anonymous - 19/01/2010 01:56 - United States

Today, I walked into Jamba Juice like I do every day. I decided to order something different than I usually do, and was flattered when the cashier recognized me. Then he switched places with another employee, and from the back room I heard, "Hey, ugly's back again." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 120

You deserved it 3 136

Birthday! Yay!

By Anonymous - 17/12/2021 08:02

Today, it's my 20th birthday. I got a text from an unknown number, asking if I knew a girl that I had been talking to for a couple months. Turns out that it was that girl’s boyfriend, who saw our messages and let me know what she’s been up to. Greatest birthday present ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 053

You deserved it 131

Classic mistake

By Need cash now - 09/07/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I had a job interview. It went rather well and I was sure they would hire me. I put in my two weeks notice at my current job and told my boss to suck a dumpster of dick. I then get an email saying they “won’t be moving forward” because my Threads and Instagram don’t “align with the company values.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 1 623

By cannedpeas - 31/12/2014 03:26 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my aunt and uncle came into the restaurant I work at to give me a late Christmas gift. The gift was the $20 tip they left, which got divided amongst all the staff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 095

You deserved it 2 305

cannedpeas tells us more.

cannedpeas 19

Wednesday 31 December 2014 15:05

Well this got posted surprisingly fast To clarify: they didn't realize that the tips we receive are for everyone, not just the waitresses. I didn't bother asking then for another $20 because I figured, hey, it's the thought that counts, and I ended up getting a decent tip pay that night anyways. Thanks for the nice comments :)

By Doggy... - 10/11/2011 05:56 - Australia

Today, my neighbours watched and laughed as I chased my dog around the lawn, trying to rescue the only clean pair of underwear I had in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 742

You deserved it 9 910

By heterolifepartner - 18/01/2010 06:03 - Australia

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years role-plays on the internet, pretending to have sex with men. His response when I confronted him about it? "Which specific incidents are you referring to?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 310

You deserved it 2 908

Freakout

By Anonymous - 11/07/2024 09:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, my boyfriend trapped me in a corner of our apartment and kept making sounds that he knows cause me to become violently angry (I have misophonia). He wouldn't stop, even though I was practically begging him to, and now he's mad that I freaked out and broke his nose to get away from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 870

You deserved it 152

Control

By justwantedtounpack - 29/12/2014 04:55 - United States

Today, my parents threw a hissy fit calling me ungrateful and disrespectful for wanting to do laundry and clean at home, instead of going out to their friends' house for dinner. They also disconnected the Internet to punish me when they left. I'm 20 and visiting home on a college break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 581

You deserved it 3 241

By Heethersays - 03/07/2009 03:06 - United States

Today, I went to the gym to lift weights because my arm muscles are pathetic. In order to use a machine, I needed to pull out a knob to adjust the seat setting. After an embarassing struggle, a worker came over and helped me. Turns out I'm not even strong enough to adjust the seat settings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 433

You deserved it 7 680

By youonlyneed2squares - 24/09/2014 04:10

Today, as I was lying in my bed eating my dinner, my roommate said to me, "I don't know how to say this, but we need more towels. The room is flooding." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 164

You deserved it 2 942

It never rains, it pours

By samsonity - 15/09/2020 17:02

Today, I woke up knowing I'd done all my homework, so I'd have the day free. My dad calls me into his room to tell me that I have 3 outstanding exam papers to hand in this week. It was summer homework, set by my school's online learning website that I didn’t know it existed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 490

Special

By Lily - 08/01/2011 16:01 - United States

Today, during a dinner party, some friends brought up how sweet, innocent and caring they thought I was. I had to sit there as my drunk boyfriend cut them off and loudly argue that I was neither sweet nor innocent, and really nothing that special at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 020

You deserved it 4 596

By life_sucks - 16/01/2010 18:46 - New Zealand

Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 053

You deserved it 7 531

By Anonyme - 16/05/2014 07:55 - Canada - Saint-jean-de-matha

Today, I finally decided to get my five-year-old son a rabbit, so I explained to him how to take care of it. When I'd finished listing all the things he'd have to do, he replied, "That's too complicated... Couldn't we just eat it instead?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 948

You deserved it 9 855

By Jake - 01/07/2009 12:28 - Australia

Today, I logged on to MSN for the first time in a month. In under 10 minutes, I found out that my little sister had changed my screen name to Jake the Weiner, told my friend that he should "suck my d***" and sent an email to all my contacts declaring my love for my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 987

You deserved it 6 515

Porch pirates are scum

By Anonymous - 27/02/2023 02:00

Today, UPS dropped off my Playstation VR2. They were supposed to get a signature but they just dropped it off and left it. By the time I got the notification that it had been delivered, it had already been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 118

You deserved it 107

Thanks, I guess

By whut - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, for my Christmas bonus at work, I got a potted plant and some lotion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 727

You deserved it 3 150

By Anonymous - 07/09/2013 23:47 - United States - Irvine

Today, my former high school bully became my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 727

You deserved it 4 045

Wrap it

By Anonymous - 28/02/2023 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I’m 16 years-old, father to a four month-old baby, and I have no idea what the fuck I’m doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 1 695

Something awful

By halitosis - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Compton

Today, I was riding the subway home with some friends when I noticed something smelled awful. My friends noticed it too. After searching for the source of the smell, it became apparent that it was my breath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 624

You deserved it 19 557

By Tyler Smith - 03/11/2011 11:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thinks my house is filled with ghosts. She can only hear them when I fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 416

You deserved it 5 734

By Ilovelife07 - 14/01/2010 15:14 - United States

Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 735

You deserved it 46 584

Gross prank, dude

By MonCoiffeurAdoré - 28/06/2012 02:43

Today, I caught my stylist in the mirror attempting to get his colleague to laugh by spitting on my head while washing my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 080

You deserved it 2 133

Not worth it

By Anonymous - 17/12/2021 20:01

Today, I drove 4 hours to see a girl I’ve been messaging with for months. Her friends came along for everything. I opted to sleep in my car, and go fishing alone. I didn’t know the river was near a nuclear power plant, so I’m probably sterile now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 417

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The Top

Today, I pulled up to a red light. My ex was in the next car, and my car's windows are so tinted that you can't see through them, so I flipped him off. I was driving my mom's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 881

You deserved it 30 737

Today, at age 31, I was about to finally lose my virginity. As we tumbled onto the bed, an excruciating pain shot through my stomach. It turned out to be a hernia, and no, I didn't get laid in the end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 369

You deserved it 4 691

Today, in a big meeting, my secretary calls me saying that I have an important call waiting. I put the call through. It was my beautician, confirming my appointment to get rid of an ingrown hair. I hurriedly confirm and hang up to see everyone in the room giggling. The speaker phone was on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 798

You deserved it 7 350

Today, I ran sound for my ex's wedding rehearsal since I was the only sound tech in town. Her dad was late for the rehearsal, so the pastor had me to walk her down the aisle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 804

You deserved it 3 997

Today, I had a video call with a couple of old friends, but the conversation sort of got boring, so I started mouthing words so they'd think the connection was bad and end the awkwardness. Then, as soon as they hung up the call, I realized I'd left my music on in the background the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 622

You deserved it 70 948

Today, I got off late from my bartending job, which is close to my house, but my boyfriend begged me to come to his place half an hour away. I decided the sex would be worth the drive. He was sound asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 387

You deserved it 566