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By noname - 09/12/2008 02:03 - France

Today, I wanted to join the bus drivers strike. I couldn't… the buses were on strike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 642

You deserved it 5 485

Tom Cruise

By Anonymous - 05/11/2021 20:00

Today, my wife and I are moving cross-country. At a rest stop, my wife complained of foot pain. I said, "Use your cruise control" and she replied "What's that?" I spent the next 10 mins teaching my 30-year-old wife what cruise control is, how it works, and how it differs from Tesla's autopilot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 890

You deserved it 354

By Anonymous - 24/01/2015 01:17 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I saw selfies of my aunt and her friends on Facebook having a great time. They took the pictures at my mother's funeral last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 949

You deserved it 2 433

By left4dead - 27/10/2012 20:04 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went on a field trip with some people from school. I'm currently confined to a wheelchair, so I had to rely on my sister to get around. She eventually went off with her friends, assuming that the people nearby would keep me company. Five minutes later, they'd all left me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 877

You deserved it 2 095

By BFH4Life - 30/11/2011 09:27 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad announced to the whole family that we will be having a vegetarian dinner this Christmas to make my step-mum happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 975

You deserved it 5 761

By Anonymous - 27/01/2011 02:53 - United States

Today, I got my phone fixed and the lady who was working on it somehow resent all the old text messages in my outbox. One was to my ex saying, "I love you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 133

You deserved it 4 198

By burningman - 22/01/2015 10:40 - Germany - Darmstadt

Today, a homeless guy tried to light my hair on fire with a match at the bus stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 996

You deserved it 2 686

By Anonymous - 02/10/2013 12:17 - United States - Southfield

Today, the person I've been trying so hard to get with wrote me a beautiful poem that almost everyone at my school saw and liked. It was about how we'd never be together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 151

You deserved it 4 506

**** off

By Anonymous - 26/10/2012 12:24 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 142

You deserved it 35 331

By clash - 28/11/2008 06:30 - France

Spicy

Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 963

You deserved it 7 620

Stay classy, bro

By Anonymous - 07/08/2020 02:02

Today, my brother got sick with a stomach bug. He didn’t even quit his game to throw up in the toilet and instead threw up straight on the carpet. It sat there for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 162

By novapine - 01/10/2013 08:34 - United States - Staffordsville

Today, I was told there was a bench warrant out for my arrest because a notice to appear for jury duty was sent to my old address and I never responded. I haven't lived at my old address for 2 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 520

You deserved it 4 042

Built to last

By Anonymous - 15/11/2021 11:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me only two weeks after he moved into my place, because his massive German shepherd keeps running scared from my cat. Apparently, I ruined his dog by letting my cat be dominant to him, and it’s all my fault his dog is a wuss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 163

I'm pissed

By embarrassed2 - 24/01/2011 02:47 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tickled me. In between laughs, I warned him that I was going to pee myself. He didn't believe me. After I actually did, he suggested we use a "safety word" from now on so that he will know when I'm being serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 002

You deserved it 4 812

Decision-Making Struggles

By FML Videos - 19/09/2018 18:30 - United States - New York

Look before you leap!

I agree, your life sucks 292

You deserved it 83

Extreme phobias

By Calimero0 - 11/08/2020 17:02

Today, it's 30 degrees Celsius in my bedroom, but I need to stay completely under the covers, because even though I live on the other side of the world, I can't stop thinking about Australian huntsman spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 1 108

Cheeky

By Anonymous - 01/01/2026 15:00

Today, I learned that my kids refer to my much older fiancé as my “Emotional support corpse.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 222

You deserved it 424

By vividrabbit - 12/07/2009 13:29 - United States

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really hit it off with. Then he admitted that he was a recovering heroin addict and had to cut our date short to go to the methadone clinic. When I got home, I realized that my wallet was missing $40. I think he lied about the "recovering" part. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 914

You deserved it 5 008

Spoiled for choice

By Anonymous - 18/08/2020 05:01

Today, my bedroom in my gran's house gets the most sun in the evenings. There is no AC, not even a fan, and the only place cool enough to sleep is the basement. Which probably hasn’t been cleaned since the '80s, and I have to share it with the biggest spider ever and a beehive in the roller shutter casing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 301

You deserved it 198

By ironorr - 26/01/2010 00:41 - United States

Today, I've been unemployed for a year. For the last six months I had been trying for a good paying job at a great company, who kept saying they would hire me when the economy improves. Three weeks ago I gave up and moved 2 hours away. Guess who just called to finally offer me a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 136

You deserved it 3 707

ironorr tells us more.

ironorr 0

Wednesday 3 February 2010 4:29

I moved because my lease was ending, and my landlord decided to jack up my rent if I decided to renew. I could no longer afford the rent, so I moved back to the area where I grew up since rent is way cheaper being so far from a city. Also, I have a potential job opportunity in the spring in this area. There were many factors leading me to make the decision to move, and all signs were pointing to the aforementioned company never actually giving me a job. But you're right. I'm a horrible person, so I totally deserve to have unfortunate things happen to me.

No kidding

By Anonymous - 29/01/2023 11:30

Spicy

Today, after trying for five years to get pregnant, I just found out that my husband had a vasectomy and he didn't tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 768

You deserved it 249

Carpe diem, yeah?

By Anonymous - 20/06/2024 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was chatting to a girl in the chemist's and was about to ask her to go for coffee when the chemist came out of the back room and asked me loudly if the rash was only on my genitals or if it had spread further. FYI the chemist is my uncle and he was joking. I didn’t end up asking her out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 602

You deserved it 113

Marooned

By fmljae - 20/01/2011 09:11

Today, I rented a 4x4 to take my wife to a secret secluded beach for our anniversary. I got as close as I could to the spot and parked on the beach. After a few romantic hours we returned to find the car half way up the windows with water. I forgot it was king tide. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 867

You deserved it 30 997

Mind melt

By roar_shark - 11/07/2009 03:41 - Canada

Today, I was driving home from my friend's house and noticed this really cute girl riding her bike. She had an amazing body, beautiful blonde hair, and looked like my kind of girl! About 10 minutes after I got home, my sister pulled up. She had just biked home from the hair salon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 284

You deserved it 30 187

With friends like these…

By z…… - This FML is from back in 2008 but it's good stuff - Greece

Today, I found out my "best friends" have gone on a crazy weekend and they didn't invite me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 675

You deserved it 4 960

By Anonymous - 24/09/2013 16:16 - Canada - Toronto

Spicy

Today, my online order arrived earlier than I expected. I opened it to find some kind of anal sex toy. Whoever this is for is going to be disappointed when they get my 3DS game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 807

You deserved it 3 055

By notaguidette - 23/01/2010 19:47 - United States

Today, I weighed myself. When I was fifteen, my mom yelled at me, saying that I was going to end up being 200 pounds by the time I was forty. Well, mom, you're wrong. At this rate I'll be 200 pounds by the time I'm twenty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 977

You deserved it 37 988

Confused

By StUbbY - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was waiting in line for breakfast at the McDonald's drive-thru. After getting so fed up that the line hadn't budged for 10 mins, I pulled out of the line, only to realize I was waiting behind 2 parked cars that were just to the left of the drive-thru lane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 890

You deserved it 59 740

Do as I say…

By Anonymous - 25/08/2020 08:08 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, my mother woke up again in a bad mood due to the quarantine and went off on how us siblings complain about each other all the time. Truth is, she's the one complaining non stop about whichever sibling is not in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 397

You deserved it 120

Mix up

By Anonymous - 26/06/2024 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, a VIP visited our building. I was put in charge of his hospitality and was very nervous. At one point, he asked me if he could, “Ahem… wash my hands.” Without thinking, I took him to our kitchen so he could use the sink. Turns out he needed a pee. He looked at me like I was an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 226

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Today, there was a power outage at my apartment. I ended up deciding that the power wasn't going to come on any time soon, and that I should go to a hotel for the night. Just after I unpacked at the hotel, my neighbor called to say the power had come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 520

You deserved it 44 122

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 643

You deserved it 4 055

Today, I had to admit that I desperately need anti-anxiety medication. Apparently, when you walk around a grocery store avoiding eye contact and generally acting "sketchy", management will call the police on you, who will then pat you down to be sure you aren't shoplifting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 646

You deserved it 2 560

Today, I discovered my water bottle had leaked and spilled water all over my backpack, ruining my notebooks, soaking my schoolbooks, and destroying my midterm portfolio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 839

You deserved it 5 731

Today, I found out there’s a university email platform I never knew about. I’m a freshman and I’ve been using my personal email to communicate with the lecturers. Now I’ve got a pile of assignments to do and most of them are overdue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 1 323

Today, I unknowingly left a five minute-long voicemail on my boss’s phone, at 3 a.m., while out drinking with friends. I have no idea what we were talking about at that time, but I know I don’t want my boss to have a candid recording of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 543

You deserved it 556