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End student debt

By Reluctant Scholar - 09/03/2022 02:00 - United States - Bloomington

Today, I'm in a US college. I could've gone into a trade or internship, but no one listened. Now, while my parents brag to their friends that their child has a degree, I'll probably be spending the rest of life in crippling debt, sleeping on the side of the road, and begging strangers for table scraps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 267

You deserved it 506

Weird dude

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I found out that the threatening and insulting messages I received from my boyfriend's "stalker ex" were actually sent by him. Why? Because he cheated and he didn't want to admit it. I'm dating a psycho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 783

You deserved it 314

By Thatgirl - 14/04/2019 20:00

Today, my grandfather told me I could bring a date to my cousin’s wedding. I said I didn't have anyone to bring. He replied, “That's the saddest thing I've heard all day.” He’s 98. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 035

You deserved it 292

By of course - 20/04/2019 12:00

Today, I woke up at 2 a.m. needing a drink. Not only did my cat wake everyone up when I tripped over him, but I also spilled a whole gallon of milk on myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 579

By Anonymous - 11/05/2019 00:00

Today, someone misread some details of my dating profile on an app and thought I was subtly indicating that I'm a prostitute. In fact, I'm a shy 33-year-old virgin who's never been kissed and has obviously been failing at using dating apps and websites for years. I guess now I know one thing I did wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 938

You deserved it 260

By littl3storm - 12/05/2019 21:30

Today, I found out that I work with a bunch of sex addicts. One of them is my cousin, and she did NOT hold back when telling me her and her fiancé's plans about swinging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 962

You deserved it 223

Red eye

By Anonymous - 28/06/2023 00:02

Today, and every day for the past 3 years, my daughter has consistently woken me up throughout the night to nurse. Bonus? She’s up by 7:00am in the morning and falls asleep around 10pm and it takes me 2 hours to fall asleep. I’m mentally and physically drained, and exhausted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 835

By 530gangsta - 25/04/2017 16:00

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 344

You deserved it 434

Am I hired?

By Genius - 25/06/2019 14:00

Today, I went to my fifth job interview in a month. While going over my CV, I found a watermark on the bottom of my cover letter that said it was generated by a template website. Yep, I gave all previous interviewers the same cover letter, with the same watermark. Can't wait to hear back! FML

I agree, your life sucks 738

You deserved it 1 951

By brittholzworth - 27/06/2019 20:00

Today, I found some cookies on my bed and got so excited that I kneed myself in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 185

You deserved it 755

My eyes! My eyes!

By bleach for my eyes please - 07/03/2021 17:01

Today, I found out the hard way that my sister has an OnlyFans. Not judging sex workers, I just really wish I’d know she goes by a stage name before I opened the clip. The things I’ve seen… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 651

You deserved it 450

Demon spawn

By Anonymous - 29/05/2022 06:00

Today, my son's head teacher yelled down the phone at me, “I’m sorry but this is the last straw, Take him home now or I’m calling the police to remove him.” He’s 9 and this will be his sixth expulsion in 4 years, and we have no idea what caused this behaviour. He behaved just fine up to 4 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 845

You deserved it 442

It's called being a wage slave

By Anonymous - 10/03/2021 11:01

Today, my new boyfriend told me he has no interest in being a dad, never has, never will, so the first time I ask him for any sort of help with my son he’s out the door. I'd dump his ass, but my mum just died so I have nowhere to go, and literally cannot afford both rent and food without his wage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 163

You deserved it 728

By Anonymous - 17/07/2019 22:00

Today, when my boyfriend came to bed, I rolled over and watched as he used his pinky to clean out both nostrils, then eat it what he found. He’s almost 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 306

Haggling wars

By Jules - 05/09/2023 04:00 - Germany

Today, at the grocery store, the scanner at the register gave a higher price for a product than the price tag on the shelf. Apparently I was the one being unreasonable for insisting to pay the price advertised on the shelf, and not some secret price they never told me about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 732

You deserved it 121

He's too old for this noise

By Anonymous - 22/09/2023 22:00

Today, my son was crying and my dad's way of helping was to go to the pub for an hour, then come back after my son had cried himself to sleep. I’d have kicked him out but he does a lot of other things around here, and I couldn’t cope without him. It doesn’t stop him being an insensitive prick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 264

You deserved it 927

By Anonymous - 11/08/2015 04:39

Today, my current boyfriend was so impressed by my blowjob abilities he sent my ex-boyfriend a message saying thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 096

You deserved it 6 445

Time flies

By Anonymous - 06/07/2022 22:00

Today, my husband asked if we could have more sex, because we spend every day together, but if he wanted celibacy, he’d have stayed single and spent time with his friends. He then pulled out a diary proving we’ve only had sex twice this year. I was completely unaware it was so infrequent. Whoops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 2 545

Karma

By anon - 10/10/2023 10:00

Today, to get my coworker fired, I spiked his coffee with whiskey. Joke's on me, he's apparently enough of a drunk that it didn't affect him. Then I dropped the bottle as I was leaving for the day, cut up my ankle, and I'm now suspended. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 2 225

Possession

By Katelyn_Louise - 01/05/2021 02:01 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, someone left their drug bag on the table in the lounge at my place, probably a friend, and probably a mistake. The next minute the cops knock on the door and force their way in. Immediately the cop spots the drug bag and cuffs me. It wasn't even my bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 882

Boing!

By nurse - 13/09/2019 02:01 - Norway

Today, I was giving a patient an injection when I heard a cracking sound and the needle was gone. Panicking, I got a doctor to have a look. The patient was sent to have x-rays to find the needle in her thigh. I then noticed the springback system in the syringe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 1 108

Boozing on the job

By paulcorrea95 - 21/09/2019 06:07 - United States

Today, I was at work, cleaning up a construction site. I picked up a beer can and accidentally spilled some of it on me. My boss came in to check on me and thought I was drunk. Instead of getting a raise, I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 831

You deserved it 200

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 05/06/2021 08:00

Today, my mom walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. Later, police turned up because mom thought she was underage. I had to desperately prove to some very angry officers that I met my girlfriend at university, and she’s almost a year older than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 431

You deserved it 195

Hiking is so much fun!

By Sacho - 24/10/2019 20:00

Today, 4 miles into a mountain hike with my crush, I suddenly felt a stomach pain, followed by the urge for explosive diarrhea. I had to stand still with my butt clenched to prevent shitting myself. There were no nearby bathrooms, and I didn't have any toilet paper. It was messy. She'll never see me the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 823

You deserved it 177

Ragebait backfire

By Melybae - 12/07/2025 20:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I’ve been systematically sharing stories and posts about how love sucks and man-bashing memes so that my crush would regret his decision about rejecting me and choosing another girl over me. He DM’ed me : “Getting tired of your shit Melissa, I’m blocking you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 1 368

The customer is sometimes devious

By dontgivemechecks - 16/03/2020 14:00

Today, I found out that I accidentally returned a customer her $147 check she had written out to pay for her groceries and receive cash back. The lady got free groceries and money, and I'm now losing my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 300

You deserved it 711

The shot of a lifetime

By Epic Fail - 10/10/2022 15:30 - United States - Steele

Today, I tried to throw a basketball in my backyard basketball hoop. It bounced off the board, hit me on the head, then hit a spray can, activating it and spraying black paint all over my Golden Retriever, to finally land in my trash can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 913

You deserved it 219

By Lightlysalted - 19/04/2018 19:00

Today, I was invited to a special meal for receiving a scholarship from my college. My mom refuses to take me because “your sister’s going there too and didn’t get a scholarship; it wouldn’t be fair to her.” I guess fairness doesn’t apply to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 317

You deserved it 240

The opposite of hustle culture

By frustrated and chequed out - 12/02/2024 09:00 - Canada - Duncan

Today, I tried to deposit a few cheques in the bank before they expired, and all I needed was the ATM. Little did I know that the bank changed their hours and now closes on the weekend. I’m busy during the week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 376

You deserved it 265

Eat the rich

By Anonymous - 11/04/2020 17:00

Today, at work, I found out that they are taking all bonus pay away, but giving us an extra $1 an hour due to Covid-19. Last week, they laid off half my department. Those people laid off are making more money on unemployment than I am now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 924

You deserved it 152

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The Top

Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 114

You deserved it 20 393

Today, I realised the extent of my wife's cat obsession when I received an $850 bill for the air conditioner she leaves on for our 5 cats while we are at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 811

You deserved it 4 317

Today, I was napping with my boyfriend and his dog. The dog was making odd coughing noises, but my boyfriend refused to kick him out of the bed. A few moments later, I rolled onto my stomach, into a pile of dog vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 700

You deserved it 4 568

Today, I came home to find that my dog had chewed up my brand new, expensive pair of shoes. I was so angry that I yelled at him and he cowered in fear. But then, as I looked at his sad little face, it dawned on me that I was the one in the wrong for getting so upset over something materialistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 260

You deserved it 997

Today, I nailed a job interview and they hired me on the spot. The only problem was I was bursting at the seams and had to poop really bad. After destroying their bathroom and taking my leave, not an hour later I got a phone call saying they're "gonna go a different direction." FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 257

Today, I finally caved and told a friend about my suicide note. She demanded that I promise I wouldn't follow through, but how could I when I was writing it no more than a few minutes before I joined a call with her? The funny thing is, most of that note was me trying to comfort my friends and family for when I'm gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 247