Today, Both my roommates (who just broke up) came home within... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Squanching - 09/03/2019 20:00 - United States - Omaha

Today, Both my roommates (who just broke up) came home within 10 minutes of each other. I had just been told that I had a 30 day notice to move as the other one pulls into the driveway. I excuse myself to the restroom and at first l heard arguing and then I heard moaning.. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 188

You deserved it 87

Summer vacations: Sun and blunders
From beaches to campsites, embark on a journey filled with laughter under the sun... and a few sunburns! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

DraftHail614 17

Saturday 9 March 2019 20:10

I will never understand why people have sex after an argument

julfunky 29

Saturday 9 March 2019 21:32

The blood gets pumping and things get heated.

Comments

DraftHail614 17

Saturday 9 March 2019 20:10

I will never understand why people have sex after an argument

julfunky 29

Saturday 9 March 2019 21:32

The blood gets pumping and things get heated.

manb91uk 22

Saturday 9 March 2019 22:58

Passions raise, there's a very fine line between anger and lust... For some people a little bit of fire can create an intense desire for the other person.

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 9 March 2019 22:03

After they had hate sex, are you allowed to stay?

Spiritbird 17

Sunday 10 March 2019 14:47

Man you will always be the funniest on fml.😂

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Kids Fight Weird Toys Health Embarrassing Funerals Poopoo peepee My ex I need your advice Relatable Love Harassment Intimacy Sex Friends Cheating Tattoos Bodyshaming Gross Smells Work Surgery Money Underwear Cops Gun control Transportation Cars Weather

The Top

The Top

Today, even though I'm overweight, I was feeling alright about the way I looked in the historical costume I'm required to wear by my job. A little kid came in and asked me if I was having a baby. Guess I don't look as good as I thought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 723

You deserved it 1 423

Today, after a big argument, my girlfriend looked me dead in the eyes and said, "I can go the rest of my life without sex, you know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 429

You deserved it 13 303

Today, I was talking to my grandpa while he was gardening outside. Suddenly I feel this hard, salty thing fly into my mouth and I spit it out. It turned out to be a beetle. My grandpa takes one look at the beetle and says, "Well, at least that poor bug finally got you to shut up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 488

You deserved it 6 502

Today, I went to a concert. I got into a fist fight with a drunk girl. My older brother tried to pull me away from her by holding both my arms back. I spent the last half of the concert in the hospital because I couldn't shield my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 582

You deserved it 7 886

Today, my teen son's ADHD is so bad that he wandered off WITH my car key and WITHOUT his phone, so I had to get a lift to our family event. When we got back, he was sat watching TV and asked me where I’d been all day. It took everything I had not to scream in his face, "YOUR SISTER'S FUCKING WEDDING!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 909

You deserved it 204

Today, on a vacation with my best friend who I’m secretly in love with, I was dressed to the nines, and felt confident and upbeat about myself. Not once has he made a move on me the entire time, not even in the hotel room we both shared. At the end of the trip he told me I’m “such a great friend.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 706