Out of control By Anonymous - 22/09/2026 09:00 - United States Today, I accidentally stuck my thumb into my eye and scratched myself just under my eyebrow. I don't know why my hand was anywhere near my eye. FML I agree, your life sucks 88 You deserved it 170 Share Tweet Share
Today, my mom found out I'm failing three classes. Now she won't let me go to a convention I bought passes for weeks in advance. Each pass was $45, and I bought 2 more for my friends. You do the math on that, because I apparently can't. FML I agree, your life sucks 18 111 You deserved it 46 041
Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserts dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said, "How do you like that?" Then my mom walked in. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 948 You deserved it 159 087
Today, my sister was "sexting" her boyfriend over Apple messages. Since we share an iTunes account the messages appeared on my iPod. Apparently, he shouldn't be silly, and should wrap his willy. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 022 You deserved it 3 650
Today, my boyfriend's head was on my lap. I bent down to kiss him. My stomach rolls got there first. FML I agree, your life sucks 22 706 You deserved it 48 870
Today, I got my fake ID and went out with the boys to dinner and the bars. One of my friends asked to see my ID. He noticed my birthday didn't make me over 21. I paid $170 for a fake ID with my real birthday. FML I agree, your life sucks 14 412 You deserved it 76 596
Today, I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes a couple of weeks ago. The upside is that the diabetic meds I've been prescribed help with weight loss. The takeaway? Diarrhea. Lots and lots of diarrhea. FML I agree, your life sucks 920 You deserved it 123
Today, my grandma miraculously survived a bout with pneumonia. She keeps saying, 'The Lord spoke to her' while she was comatose. While comatose, she had to be physically restrained because she would unconsciously mess with the medical equipment, and when she woke up, she was completely delirious. Yeah, no. FML I agree, your life sucks 717 You deserved it 152
Today, my dad is terminally ill from bone cancer. It’s been 2 months and not even one of my so-called friends have asked me how I’m doing or how my parents are doing. They do however contact me when they need something. I have always been there for them - guess I was a fool. FML I agree, your life sucks 885 You deserved it 138