Miscellaneous: Help! I need somebody! Anybody!

Help! I need somebody! Anybody!

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I called up Verizon Wireless to "complain" about my phone service. I really had nothing to complain about, I was just that lonely that I wanted someone to talk to. FML

agreeclassic 18 276

vote type 1 31 357

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By lonely loser - 22/08/2014 18:04 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

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Today, I was so lonely that I pretended I wanted to buy something from a telemarketer so that they would keep talking to me. FML

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By LonelyAF - 12/08/2017 13:00

Today, I was so lonely I called my stalker ex-boyfriend. He was too busy to talk. FML

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By forever alone - this FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I was so desperate for someone to talk to I called various restaurants pretending to be interested in ordering food, just so I could have a conversation. I called eleven different places. FML

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Forever alone man

By Boyufd - 02/01/2021 08:00

Today, I feel so lonely I talked to the likely scam number that called me. Even then they hung up after 2 minutes of talking to me. FML

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Today, I realized how lonely I am when someone called my number by mistake and I talked with them for 5 minutes. I don’t know who she was, but I'm so lonely I was happy to have someone engage in a conversation, even if it was about her calling the wrong number. FML

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By stuff - 16/08/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I was calling my cable company to tell me how to fix my internet. I stayed on hold for almost half an hour, and then when someone finally picked up, my phone died. FML

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Hello?

By Anonymous - 17/07/2024 16:00 - Canada

Today, I butt-dialed my ex-boyfriend while venting to my best friend about how hot but emotionally unavailable he is. I realized this when there was a lull in the conversation and I heard his tinny little voice coming out of the phone, saying, "I can hear you." FML

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By Jakeok - 14/11/2014 00:04 - United States - Fraser

Today, I once again used my phone to get out of a conversation with someone, instead of actually talking to someone on it. FML

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By Theboredone - 29/03/2018 19:00

Today, after a week on bed rest in a cast after ankle surgery, I got so bored and lonely I agreed to do an hour-long government phone survey just to have someone to talk to. FML

agreeclassic 3 813

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albinoV 1

Friday 3 December 2010 14:24

You feel it's OK to annoy people for no good reason, and wonder why you're alone?

GreatGeak 8

Friday 3 December 2010 9:01

fail. it's called facebook and chatrooms.

Comments

Gumbinator 11

Monday 6 December 2010 22:45

kids help phone? That works too...

Teazer13 0

Tuesday 7 December 2010 23:13

happens more than you think. don't beat yourself up about it.

LinzeeNardiello 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 9:17

awww :(

Purple_pixie 0

Monday 27 December 2010 8:46

Do you wanna be my friend? ;)

awesumnes 0

Thursday 31 March 2011 4:47

Wow... U should talk to AT&T!! :D

beaglegun2009 4

Wednesday 18 July 2012 18:09

Nah they suck.

ifmlftw 0

Friday 1 April 2011 1:25

go to college.

lucy_moff09 0

Sunday 26 June 2011 3:54

call your mum and give her a nice surprise

XCraig 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 8:29

That's why they invented chatroulette! Just uhh... Skip the people wanking off...

iamcoolyo 5

Friday 18 November 2011 1:25

Well poodles…are kindof mean

Coffeebang 17

Monday 6 February 2012 10:34

Go out more

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

agreeclassic 47 796

vote type 1 9 665

Today, I came to the unpleasant realization that my friends only keep me around because I’m nice, know when to keep my mouth shut, and am willing to listen to them vent. In short, I’m the therapist friend. FML

agreeclassic 864

vote type 1 173

Today, my boyfriend said we needed to talk. He called me cruel, cold and heartless and that it’s making him reconsider what kind of future we may have together. All because I hate sappy movies and don’t cry on the scenes where the dogs die. FML

agreeclassic 858

vote type 1 286

Today, my wife is grumpy because our son has his first girlfriend and she feels like she’s been replaced. Our son is 32 and surely it’s about damn time. FML

agreeclassic 1 882

vote type 1 167

Today, I woke up to a text from my manager, saying "Hed's up dude, ur gettin fired tomoz. CEO's pissed. No hard feelins m8". Great. FML

agreeclassic 36 820

vote type 1 3 014

Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML

agreeclassic 59 496

vote type 1 6 204