Intimacy, Sex, Weird and NSFW: Extra NSFW - FML

Extra NSFW

By WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK - 30/05/2026 21:00 - United States - New York

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me how she got the scars on her legs. I'd assumed they were self-harm scars. Nope, apparently getting sliced up turns her on, and if I want a good sex life, I'd better get used to cutting her thighs with a razor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 149

You deserved it 53

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Same thing different taste

Slicy slicy

By ChloeLuvzAnime - 30/03/2021 17:01

Spicy

Today, I got the courage to surprise my boyfriend by shaving my pubic region. To my agonizingly painful dismay, the razor sliced through an apparent zit on one of my lips. Now my vagina is bleeding for a whole different reason, and I'm possibly traumatized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 131

You deserved it 288

Bad women's anatomy

By Anonymous - 07/07/2021 08:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend noticed dark lines that look like scars on my inner thighs. He confronted me about them, thinking I was cutting myself, and now wants me to see a therapist because he thinks I'm suicidal. They're stretch marks. He won't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 538

You deserved it 133

By still learning - 26/02/2012 17:42 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I cut myself while shaving my globes. My girlfriend now refuses to stop teasing me about being "fisted by Edward Scissorhands." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 091

You deserved it 7 978

It's not what you think

By tessykins - 22/10/2009 07:41 - United States

Today, this guy who likes me accused me of cutting myself. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, "Don't lie, I saw those scars on your thighs when we went swimming." I have stretch marks on my inner thighs, and now I have to explain them to him so he doesn't think I cut myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 395

You deserved it 3 306

By Anonymous - 28/09/2013 11:44 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out this girl I had sex with lied to me. They weren't razor burn bumps. And I now have them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 805

You deserved it 40 350

Oops, I Did It Again

By Anonymous - 12/09/2019 04:00 - United States - New York

Spicy

Today, I had to explain to my mom that the bruises I have all over my body are not due to abuse, but because I'm into really rough sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 824

You deserved it 772

By Anonymous - 19/10/2012 20:54 - Czech Republic - Ceska

Spicy

Today, while making love to my wife, I felt adventurous and told her to hit me. She didn't so much as hesitate before savagely slapping me with her ring hand. Now I'm back home from the hospital, with stitches closing up a huge gash on my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 595

You deserved it 31 851

By Anonymous - 20/07/2013 21:31 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a man stopped me on the street. He said the stretch marks on my thighs looked like cuts, and asked me if I self-harmed. Before I was able to politely respond "No", he said, "I mean, I can see why you would." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 607

You deserved it 3 982

Stop assuming the worst!

By notbeeatingmywife - 21/08/2022 06:00 - United States - Denver

Today, my girlfriend has some bruises from her karate class. We went shopping together and needless to say, I got quite a few dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 891

You deserved it 102

Signposting

By Anonymous - 26/12/2015 05:40 - United States - Latonia

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my 13-year-old sister cutting her pubic hair with scissors. After a long talk about what on earth she was doing, she confessed to doing it so her boyfriend could find her clitoris. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 699

You deserved it 2 504

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Today, after having severe acne for 7 years and trying every affordable option available to fix it, decided that I would splurge on a $230 face cleanser. I got home and tried it immediately. The results? I had an allergic reaction to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 016

You deserved it 343

Today, after a day of walking around downtown, shopping and going out to eat, I came home to notice I had a dirty thong stuck to the back of my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 524

You deserved it 658

Today, my boyfriend, who doesn't wear deodorant and has horrible dandruff, decided to shower for the first time in nearly a week because he got invited out to a bar. He didn't even invite me to go with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 776

You deserved it 39 881

Today, my dad casually mentioned my half-sister in conversation. He had her out of wedlock when he was only 13. NEWS TO ME, HE'S NEVER MENTIONED I HAVE A HALF-SISTER BEFORE AND I'M FREAKING 22 YEARS-OLD. Apparently he and mom thought I knew, and just forgot to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 101

Today, my sister decided to have her baby shower on my birthday. I recently had a miscarriage and she knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 270

You deserved it 124

Today, my family went to the Christmas tree farm, and cut down the perfect tree. When we got home we put the kids down for a nap and took some time to relax. We went out to the truck to bring the tree into the house, it was gone. Someone stole my Christmas tree from my driveway in broad daylight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 508

You deserved it 5 846