Intimacy: Emergency

Emergency

By Anonymous - 03/05/2009 23:22 - United States

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of two years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

agreeclassic 307 538

vote type 1 20 918

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By Anonymous - 26/07/2011 04:30 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was over at my house for the first time. I told her I had to go take a shower, and from the other room my grandmother yells "you're not going to jack off this time are you?" FML

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YOUNGSMUTTY 0

Monday 4 May 2009 10:08

That's sad. I hope your grandma's alright! You're such a sweet boy for going home to help her. I'll take your virginity ;) Haha jk.

shortandloud 0

Monday 4 May 2009 10:09

That sucks about not getting sex but I have to say that the whole getting stuck between the bowl and the wall is pretty hilarious.

Comments

Sugar_lipsXo 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:42

keep it in your parents. after your girlfriend dumps you, you'll be bitter for giving her your virginity. it's a sign bro.

hhhhyoyoyo 1

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:45

gee im sorry

fmyoptical 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 3:48

Because you did a good deed karma well help you and get you better sex the next time you try to lose that V card. :)

EG_dod 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 4:06

This made my day! Cockblocked by a slippery toilet.

SleepiiHeadd 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 4:21

Hahaha, That's the best FML I've read so far ^^

RedJester23 6

Tuesday 5 May 2009 4:32

YOU GOT **** BLOCKED *clap...clap.... clap clap clap* instead of lets go eagles

megan_is_cool 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 4:46

HAHAHA. I found this completely hilariious. But, damn your life sucks

surferdude15 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 7:04

hmmmm " im not making this up" idk something about that sentence makes me want to accuse him of "making it up"

teensm 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 7:21

#153 i agree w/ you

doll_face 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 7:48

#153, i thought the same thing. but this story is way too good to just call off. i'd like to think it's real :p

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