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Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Shopping

    Jelly?

    By kallens - 15/01/2009 23:08 - United States

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I was at Target with my mom. After 10 minutes of my mom walking around looking confused, I said, "Mom, what are you looking for? I worked at this place for 4 years, I know where everything is." My mom was looking for K-Y Jelly. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 23 924
    You deserved it 2 837
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    Odorama

    By carla - 13/01/2009 01:35 - France

    Today, as I came out of changing rooms in a clothes shop, I gave back all the stuff I'd tried on to a saleswoman. I then walked off, made it a couple of yards, changed my mind, and decided to purchase one of the items I'd tried. When I got back, the saleswoman was spraying the changing room I'd used with deodorant. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 19 591
    You deserved it 10 798
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    Keywords

    Relatable Food Work Miscellaneous Parents Delivery Awkward Weddings Friends Love Weird Intimacy Shopping Clothes Mysterious Laundry Transportation Embarrassing Job interview Annoying Health Dentist Dogs Mental health Animals Cats Neighbours Gross Poopoo peepee Family
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Random FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 28 356
    You deserved it 7 543
    Today, at a science-fiction convention, a woman came up to me and told me that my white face paint was a mess, my contacts looked cheap, and my costume was an all-round failure. I wasn't wearing a costume, I'm an albino. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 51 135
    You deserved it 3 065
    Today, I had my first kiss with this guy that I really liked. We started making out and he stopped and had this bizarre look on his face. I thought he was liking it, so I said, "You're a good kisser, you wanna go to the bedroom?" He replied with, "I'll pass, you have really bad breath". FML
    I agree, your life sucks 22 063
    You deserved it 57 480
    Today, I was touching myself under the sheets at 2:00 a.m. when my very drunk dad walked into the room. I was afraid to move my hand for fear of getting caught red-handed, so I had a 30 minute conversation with him with my fingers still inside me. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 3 540
    You deserved it 950
    Today, I found out I had gotten a parking ticket while I was travelling a few months back in California. I moved since, so I didn’t know I had it so it increased to 200$ and when I told the guy who was actually driving the car about it, he blocked me. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 943
    You deserved it 144
    Today, my boyfriend is once again mad at me because I refused to have shower sex with him. I’m too embarrassed to explain to him that ever since I could remember, if I don’t take my showers sitting down, I vomit. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 993
    You deserved it 501
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