Parents

Mommy's best boy

By Anonymous - 27/03/2022 10:00 - United States - Wilmington

Today, I realized that my mom has not had a date, or had sex, in 50 years. I've become her 'Husband-Son'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 207

My body, my choice

By Anonymous - 06/04/2024 14:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, I had to sit and listen in mortification as my mother tearfully told our therapist how much sleep she loses over my being morbidly obese. She doesn't seem to care that I'm body positive and happy with the way I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 1 121

Panic!

By not amused - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Ireland - Cork

Today, my dad woke me up in a panic at five to ten in the morning, because he couldn't figure out how to type the "@" in an e-mail address. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 350

You deserved it 1 525

Different together

By jessie - 15/05/2021 04:00

Today, my mom walked in on me shaving the tops of my legs. She called me a freak, since apparently women aren’t even supposed to grow hair there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 89

I'm the father who stepped up

By Anonymous - 02/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my parents started nagging me yet again to have kids. When I pointed out that I already do, they scoffed and said that my five step-kids don't count. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 78

By VedaLynn - 03/12/2012 23:01 - United States

Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 055

You deserved it 2 696

Financial control

By Brando - 01/09/2022 06:00

Today, I woke up to a video call from my entitled father, who was fuming and yelling at me for buying a PS5. With MY money. I don't even live with him anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 032

You deserved it 104

Stress test

By haramara - 25/05/2021 17:01

Today, while driving on the streets for the first time, my mom decided that it would be an appropriate time to yell at me for every single mistake I’ve ever made in my life. This stressed me out so much I began driving against traffic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 169

Nice to see you

By JeezyCherieze - 11/04/2009 01:10 - United States

Today, my father, who I rarely see, drove 400 miles to my wedding. I was so happy to see him, until he got completely trashed at my reception, asked me where he could "score some weed" and told me what a bitch my mom was, and how I needed to lose weight. For over an hour. At my wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 470

You deserved it 4 075

Put it away!

By Put on some trousers, you asshole! - 27/06/2021 18:01 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I'm temporarily staying at my parents' place because my mother injured her knee and can't walk, and for the second time, I caught my father walking around with his bare dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 277

You deserved it 160

Gatekeeping

By My eyes and ears - 21/08/2022 00:00 - United States

Today, I have accidentally encountered my parents having "sexy time" four times in the past week. I'm an adult. My parents are in their fifties. Their bedroom door doesn't fully shut, so I always get an unpleasant glimpse when I walk past, occasionally punctuated by my mom's pleasured moaning. Kill me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 984

You deserved it 653

Ironic

By Anonymous - 20/03/2022 16:00

Today, my dad yelled at me for using legal marijuana to help treat my potentially terminal cancer, which is kind of hypocritical for the man who spent significant portions of my childhood in jail for selling cocaine to rich high school kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 273

You deserved it 112

Accident waiting to happen

By Anonymous - 03/01/2024 22:00

Today, after my husband bought our son a sword for Xmas, sure enough, I found a stab mark in my living room wallpaper, and the sword now has a bent tip. My son denies everything and my husband claims I’m overreacting by yelling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 219

Dementia?

By Anonymous - 24/05/2026 00:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my dad called me a pussy and said I wasn't a real man, simply because I hugged and kissed my son and told him that I loved him. It gets even better though. My dad was openly affectionate and loving to me when I was a kid, then somewhere along the line, he became this horrible person. Can't go no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 428

You deserved it 72

Priorities

By Anonymous - 01/01/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I'm 23 and have never had a weekend or holiday off of working in my life. My requests are always denied. I've been through three jobs since high school. I understand that some workers have to look after family or kids, but the 19 year-olds, who have way more time than I do, always get it their way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 512

You deserved it 147

I told you so

By Anonymous - 08/04/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, my dad sent me back and forth repeatedly to the auto parts store for a replacement headlight bulb. He kept insisting that what I brought back was the wrong bulb. I had to drag him there to show I was getting the right one by asking the clerk. He's wrong, but is mad at me for embarrassing him in front of the staff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 91

Save the children

By Anonymous - 15/06/2023 03:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, after my ex-husband always said we would never let our kids have screen time, since our divorce he has let screens do 100% of his parenting, while he day-drinks, and yet if I try to take the kids away from him, he threatens lawyers straight away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 174

Don't mention it

By Anonymous - 28/03/2022 12:00 - United States - Verona

Today, my mother went on another long rant, detailing 20 years of bad things that we all already knew about a relative. The slightest recollection in a conversation never fails to turn into unending monologues. I can't change the past, nor the subject of conversation apparently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 824

You deserved it 95

Crockery story

By WasteOfOxygen08 - 23/06/2019 04:34

Today, I woke up and headed downstairs ready to do the dishes, when my mom hissed at me to, “go do the dishes!” As I was washing them, my mom stood over me the whole time. She eventually said, “You know, it’s pretty fucking sad that I still have to tell you to do these things.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 967

You deserved it 458

Pride and prejudice

By Anonymous - 28/01/2024 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, in a misguided attempt to earn my asshole dad's approval I went to university to get my business degree and took over the family restaurant. Now I have all the stress of managing the restaurant, he has retired and is moving abroad. Oh, and he still isn’t proud of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 543

You deserved it 313

The great escape

By danny - 12/09/2024 09:00 - Australia

Today, I had to pretend my phone was broken because my mom kept calling to ask if she could join my friends and me for karaoke night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 104

Happy birthday anyway!

By bdaygirl - 11/05/2024 16:00 - United States - Grand Rapids

Today, I received a short happy birthday message from my father. He’s never been one to show affection, and I haven’t spoken to him in months since he only reaches out to ask for money. This might have given me hope that he cares or wants a relationship with me. Except… it’s not my birthday, and I don’t think he knows that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 113

Experimental

By Anonymous - 01/01/2025 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, holding my teenager's hand at the hospital, I unfortunately had a front row seat as a nurse manipulated his penis trying to pop a ball bearing out of his urethra. He had been curious to see if it fit. It did. And no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t pee it out, so off to the hospital we went. FML

I agree, your life sucks 571

You deserved it 151

Alpha moron

By Anonymous - 17/08/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, after all my years of teaching, I may have met the most ignorant sack of sentient excrement on the planet. A man came into the office demanding his son be transferred out of my class because he can’t be an "alpha" if he’s being taught by a woman (read that as "bitch"). FML

I agree, your life sucks 457

You deserved it 65

More issues than Vogue

By Anonymous - 04/07/2020 20:00

Today, my wife is grumpy because our son has his first girlfriend and she feels like she’s been replaced. Our son is 32 and surely it’s about damn time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 920

You deserved it 169

In this economy?

By Anonymous - 29/07/2023 06:00 - United States - Ontario

Today, I'm broker than ever. I work a full time job but I STILL can't afford basic adult necessities. My mom keeps asking me to pay a bill that I can't afford (and has nothing to do with her) but she's been opening my mail, and questions my unpaid bills. I'm 36 and I can't afford to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 784

You deserved it 259

Parenting 101

By butihelppaythebills - 10/10/2022 01:00

Today, I got a tattoo. My mom got upset and threw a bitch fit about how my body "is a temple and it belongs to God.” I told her, “My body, my choice.” She responded with, “Oh really? Well, my house, my choice who lives here. Pack your shit and get the fuck out.” I’m currently in my car with nowhere to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 850

You deserved it 1 381

Bad guy

By Anonymous - 07/05/2025 00:00

Today, my father got drunk and became crazy. He just kept talking nonsense and swaying while walking. It seemed like he was going to vomit. I hate him being like this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 556

You deserved it 85

Not a good look

By tamponface - 30/07/2011 12:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I was really excited because the girl I'd liked since freshman year asked me out. She came to my house and my mom decided to show her baby pictures of me with tampons up my nose because I'd had a nose bleed. Even worse, there was one picture of me when I was 15 doing the same thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 181

You deserved it 9 947

You deal with it

By Anonymous - 07/08/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, one year after giving my girlfriend an ultimatum that if she aborted our baby, then I would leave, she had the baby… and then left it with me. Now I'm stuck as a single parent while she is out living the high life, wanting nothing to do with either of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 1 175

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The Top

Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 375

You deserved it 7 877

Today, I was taking a bath and out of boredom started making sheep noises. I then had a conversation with myself in farm animal noises. When I got out of the bath, I walked to my bedroom in my towel, passing the living room… where my little brother's soccer team burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 060

You deserved it 75 628

Random

Today, I finally worked up enough courage to ask out the guy I've had a crush on for months. I texted him, and he thought I was Maddy from work, not Maddie his neighbor. Now he and the Maddy from his work are dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 471

You deserved it 5 857

Today, I found out that Cheetos are flammable, as is my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 972

You deserved it 10 282

Today, someone had the unique opportunity to be able to say to me, "Excuse me, your pants are on fire." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 121

You deserved it 5 384

Today, I found out that no matter how careful you are during this pandemic, wearing a mask, washing hands, and social distancing, you can still get COVID. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 088

You deserved it 284

Today, after I spent years, and thousands of dollars, searching for my birth father, he changed his mind about adopting me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 913

You deserved it 173

Today, I was washing the dishes when my wife came in wearing a new lingerie set, smiling at me. I dropped what I was doing and carried her to bed. After we'd finished, she went downstairs for a drink, saw the dishes I hadn't cleaned, and started a fight. Now I'm on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 168