akabbitt

Mrs Arlington, United States 53 years-old In a relationship

Anonymous 22 April 2014, 03:00 United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, after years of marriage and my lazy husband letting himself go, I can now finish a bottle of wine and still be sober. This means I've built immunity to the last thing that can make me want to have sex with him. FML

104 comments

Anonymous This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff London, United Kingdom

Sounds fun

Today, my boyfriend was entertaining himself by shoving tampons up his nose and seeing how far across the bed he could blow them. This man is the father of my son. FML

65 comments

Anonymous 26 September 2014, 21:07 Pensacola, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

135 comments