whyarepeopledumb

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Whyarepeopledumb's favorite FMLs

By Mal2222 - 12/02/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, at work, a man walked up the escalator with his chubby kid next to him and asked me where the shoe section was. I said, "For you or your son?" He said, "For my daughter." FML

agreeclassic 15 306

vote type 1 35 182

Spooked

By broke - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I started my new job as a dishwasher, and was very excited since I've been broke for weeks. A few people dined and dashed, apparently for the first time in the restaurant's history. My boss is superstitious. She fired me. FML

agreeclassic 34 898

vote type 1 2 407

By Tom Ali - 10/01/2012 20:50 - United States

Today, while driving to my girlfriend's house, I passed up a stop sign without stopping. A car passing by honked. I honked back several times and flipped them the finger. Turns out it was my girlfriend's dad trying to say hi. FML

agreeclassic 10 219

vote type 1 65 185

By OH COME ON - 29/12/2011 15:48 - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend on the way to the hospital to tell him I needed stitches, after my brother's dog bit me on the breast. His response? "Pics or it didn't happen." FML

agreeclassic 33 771

vote type 1 5 559

By fmT719 - 18/12/2011 23:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

agreeclassic 23 650

vote type 1 17 383