Genociiide

Miss 30 years-old In a relationship

Anonymous 9 February 2013, 20:03 Chula Vista, United States

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

128 comments

Anonymous This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff Crystal Lake, United States

Here, have this

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

82 comments