jaimielynne

It's the thought that counts, right?

Today, my mother said I'm slipping too deep into depression since my boyfriend left for college in Fresno. Her solution? Buying me a vibrator. FML

You hypocrite

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle just above my breasts. She said, "If I can see this, ever, your shirt is either too low cut or too see through and it will be thrown away." FML