Miss
Today, I cried harder than I have in years. I was babysitting, and watching Pokémon to pass the time. It was the episode where Ash, Dawn, and Brock on the show went their separate ways, and may never be together again. FML
Today, I was fired. My boss told me via email that it was because I "don't have enough experience with fun spiritual." Uh, what? FML
Today, I cheated on my math exam. I still failed. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not letting her keep the 75 cents that she stole from my truck. FML
Today, an old lady hit me with her car, after which she said, "Oh! Not again!" FML
Today, I was informed that due to my cat being aggressive and attacking the postman several times, my mail would no longer be delivered to my address. I don't own a cat. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I would be ecstatic if he hadn't stuck the ring on his balls and asked for a blow-job. He even confessed that the original plan was to stick it on his penis but it was too small. FML
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