musicman48

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

Today, I found out that the only reason my guy friends actually hang out with me at my house all the time is because they think my mom is hot. FML