The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month

The top of the year

Decorum and etiquette

By Anonymous - 11/12/2025 12:00

Today. I used the restroom at the mall. After I wiped, I went to toss the paper into the toilet. I missed horribly. The wad of TP with poop on it landed on the floor of the next stall. It was occupied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 482

Take the L, dude

By Paint on fire - 22/02/2025 18:00 - United States

Today, I found out the girl I’ve spent so much time bending over backwards for lied about having to work on Valentine’s. She went on a date with another guy instead. Furious, I went to Lowe’s and bought red paint to douse on her car. I cut my hand and had to get stitches trying to open the case. I can never win. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 1 307

There was an attempt…

By Anonymous - 26/03/2025 09:00 - United Kingdom - Newcastle

Today, I tried to flirt with a guy at the gym by commenting on his headphones, saying, “Nice headphones, you must be into music.” He stared at me blankly and said, “I’m not wearing any headphones, these are just my ears.” I swear I heard him laugh as I backed away, defeated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 486

Anti-stink measures

By Sardine man - 12/04/2025 21:00 - United States - New York

Today, my coworkers surprised me with a bunch of gift cards to Panera, Chick-fil-A, Chipotle, and other nearby fast food places, as well as an "Easy Work Lunches" cookbook. When I reacted with shock, they said, "We're all so sick of you eating cans of sardines in the break room everyday. Please eat anything else." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 759

Goofball

By Anonymous - 09/11/2025 12:00

Today, as I was folding laundry, I found some of my wife’s sexy panties. I’m kind of a hairy guy so I thought it would be hilarious to put them on and send her some goofy pics. She thought it was hilarious alright, mostly because they were our daughter’s not hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 522

Naughty boy

By Mark - 25/11/2025 12:00

Today, coming home with my water bottle and venti Starbucks in one hand, and my 4 month-old leashed puppy on my other hand, I entered my condo building as a little girl was holding the door open. As I said thank you, my dog lunged towards her, I pulled him back, and most of my Caramel Brûlée Latte went flying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 480

Merry Mystery Christmas!

By Santa - 24/12/2025 00:00

Today, I wrapped all my Christmas gifts at midnight. In my exhaustion, I forgot to label them. On Christmas morning, everyone will open presents while I try to remember who was supposed to get socks versus who was supposed to get a coffee maker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 350

Multitasking

By Anonymous - 14/06/2025 20:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, during an online class, I forgot to mute myself while trying to get my dog to poop. The whole class, including my professor, heard me sing “Push It” by Salt-N-Pepa to motivate her. They all had many questions when I came back on camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 498

Sent from my beach towel

By Anonymous - 07/07/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I meant to send a cheeky “I’m out of the office” reply to my team but instead hit “reply all” on an email chain with my entire company, including my boss, HR, and some clients. The message included a joke about “sleeping through meetings” that was NOT work-appropriate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 639

Merry little Christmas

By Anonymous - 06/12/2025 15:00

Today, I was uninvited to the family Christmas party. Apparently, everyone is tired of me "refusing to watch or discipline my own kids". Sure, one of them is autistic and has violent meltdowns, but I thought it took a village to raise a child? FML

I agree, your life sucks 104

You deserved it 1 009

Not cool

By Anonymous - 06/10/2025 22:00

Today, I was trying to shop in peace when a single mom with a whole herd of loud brats went tearing through the aisles. I told her that if her kids had fathers they wouldn’t behave that way. The oldest screamed, “Our daddy died!” causing all the kids to break into hysterics. The mom cried too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 1 390

Luscious locks

By lukey101 - 12/01/2025 06:00 - Australia

Today, I discovered that I bought two shampoos instead of a shampoo and conditioner. So for the past three months, I’ve been washing my hair twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 476

Doofus

By Pete - 28/09/2025 03:00

Today, I tried to make popcorn in the microwave but forgot to remove the plastic wrapper. The kitchen filled with smoke, the fire alarm went off and my neighbors came knocking to see if I was alright. When they asked what caused it, I had to admit that it was “Erm… popcorn.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 414

I'm sorry

By Pete - 29/01/2025 22:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I spent 20 minutes practicing a heartfelt apology to my girlfriend for forgetting our anniversary. When I finally delivered it, she stared at me blankly and said, “Our anniversary is next week.” Now I’ve apologised for nothing, and she knows I’ll probably forget the actual date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 556

Socially inept

By Anonymous - 19/02/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I went to a grocery store and tried one of those free samples of a new type of cheese. When I went to throw the toothpick away, I dropped it in a large container of olive oil. Not realizing it was a “special” display, I casually tried to scoop out the toothpick with my hand... only to get shooed away by an employee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 560

First question: Why?

By Jackie Lee - 23/06/2025 03:00 - United States - Salisbury

Today, I went dumpster diving with my partner, looking for random things, and my phone fell into the dumpster. My partner went in there to look for it and couldn't find it, so now I'm phoneless and my phone is somewhere in the dumpster mixed into the trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 638

Alpha top dog

By Anonymous - 22/12/2025 03:00

Today, I was meeting my daughter's boyfriend and I joked I’d have to show him who was boss around here (my wife, without a doubt) but as a 5”8 man I have no idea how to intimidate a 6”11, 20 year-old who looks like he was born in a gym. My wife won’t stop laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 427

OK then…

By Anonymous - 16/11/2025 00:00

Today, in a grocery store, the cashier asked if we found everything OK. Before I could answer, my kid said, “Mom says the shop smells like poor people.” I don’t even remember saying that, but judging by the cashier’s face it must be a family business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 432

"Your text here"

By Rerere - 24/02/2025 03:00 - Australia

Today, I gave my friend what I thought was the perfect birthday gift, a personalized mug with her favourite quote. When she opened it, she looked confused so I explained. Then she said, "I’ve never ever said that." I realized I'd printed a quote from a completely different friend. I awkwardly told her, “Well, now you have something new to say!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 593

Never say never

By Haley - 03/07/2025 10:00 - Canada - Halifax

Today, I’ve become obsessed with Fortnite, like, all I think about is Fortnite. Since Fortnite came out, I'd always said, “That’s such a bad game, it’s so stupid, I’m never playing that.” Now, it’s June 2025, I only started playing in March of this year, and I’ve even become better than my boyfriend who’s been playing for years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 450

Name the artist!

By Anonymous - 19/10/2025 12:00

Today, at a concert, I tried to film my favorite song for Instagram. I sang along dramatically, screamed the chorus, and danced like no one was watching. When I rewatched the video later, I realized I had my phone camera flipped, recording my sweaty, overexcited face the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 555

We meet again (somewhat)

By Tracey - 09/09/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I ran to hug my best friend at the airport after not seeing her for two years. I sprinted, arms wide, yelling her name. Turns out it wasn’t her. It was a stranger with the same haircut who looked absolutely horrified as I body-slammed them in baggage claim. My actual friend was behind me, trying to film the embarrassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 402

WAKEY WAKEY

By Anonymous - 19/11/2025 09:00

Today, I woke up to the sound of my own voice yelling, “GET UP, YOU LAZY CUNT!” on repeat. It took me a moment to remember I'd drunkenly recorded my own alarm last night because I thought it would “motivate” me. It scared me so much I fell off the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 476

To infinity and beyond

By Gwen - 07/08/2025 21:00 - Russia - Kolomna

Today, it's much easier to get things on now in our 40s than it was when we were younger. However, if I want to boost things even further, I don't need adult movies, but an episode of the Buzz Lightyear show from 2000s. This guy gives me such a girl boner that my husband now calls our sexual stuff "Lightyearing around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 335

Where did you learn that one?

By Kilamo - 19/06/2025 09:00 - France - Paris

Today, I tried to impress a French student by saying “Bonjour!” but instead said “Bordel!” which means “Brothel.” She laughed, and so did every one of the french students around us. My cultural street cred is officially dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 485

Template

By Chad - 21/04/2025 14:00 - United States - York Village

Today, I made a digital contact card for my department that needed to be sent to payroll. Since we didn't have one before, I sent a copy to the rest of the department to use if they wanted. I didn't send the blank though. I sent 100s of people all of my contact info. Somehow, I managed to misspell my own name too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 506

Judgement

By Anonymous - 13/10/2025 03:00

Today, I was venting to my dog about how my roommate never cleans. I said, “You’re the only one who listens, at least you don’t judge me.” I didn’t realize my roommate was standing behind me holding a trash bag. The dog wagged his tail. My roommate did not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 393

Charlie Chaplin is not dead

By ahjhdsbhjjhcs - 07/05/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I was watching a movie on my chair. I leaned back on the back of the chair and kept leaning back. Then I slowly fell down with my chair, onto the floor. It made a big noise, but nobody was hurt, it was just really absurd, like I'd watched another episode of Mr. Bean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 345

Bloody Janet

By Not Janet - 28/05/2025 03:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was on a Zoom call with my mic muted. Or so I thought. After about a minute, I started ranting about how Janet always gets credit for my work. Janet was in the meeting. So was my boss. None of them was receptive to my criticism. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 619

The coast is clear

By Anonymous - 29/04/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, I went to a really hot chick I’ve known for years's house, because she said her soon to be ex-husband had gone on a business trip for work. While I was sitting in the house with a ton of cologne on and a fresh shave, the husband walked in, looked at me, and said, "What’s up?" Guess I'm not getting laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 590

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I was ringing an old man up in the local grocery store when I had realized all he was buying was 3 bottles of vodka and a box of condoms. While I was loading the bags into his cart he laid his hand on my shoulder and told me, "I'd take you home with me but chances are I would be arrested". FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 532

You deserved it 6 044

Today, my sister ran into my room unannounced while I was on webcam with a potential employer. Before I could react, she looked at my screen, said "Damn, he's fucking hot." and flashed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 260

You deserved it 5 280

Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 749

You deserved it 5 792

Today, I received an email from my stepmom. It was a picture of a boy that she said she thought I might like to know. Next to the picture was the message, "He comes from a good military background." My love life is so pathetic that my stepmother feels the need to try and set me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 360

You deserved it 4 943

Today, at work, I'm supervising one person. Recently there's been tension between her and a couple of other coworkers, one of which was her friend. I spent the day running around and trying to smooth things over, just to find out what started this was her walking in on her former friend talking about her behind her back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 105

Today, my dad decided to get his friend to help move our old sofa to save money. Its leg got stuck in the doorway, scratched the entire hallway wall, punched a big hole in it, and the other leg made a big dent in our front door. We live in an apartment complex and now have to to pay for everything to be fixed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 258

You deserved it 6 254