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Love life struggles

By ihatemyself07 - 09/12/2025 20:00

Today, I came to terms with the fact that in order to get a boyfriend, I need to slim down. When I put full-body shots on dating apps, I get swiped left on. But when I put headshots, I get matches. And lots of them. But I can’t catfish these dudes. Time to go on a diet and hit the gym. It’s not fair. FML

agreeclassic 181

vote type 1 387

Merry little Christmas

By Anonymous - 06/12/2025 15:00

Today, I was uninvited to the family Christmas party. Apparently, everyone is tired of me "refusing to watch or discipline my own kids". Sure, one of them is autistic and has violent meltdowns, but I thought it took a village to raise a child? FML

agreeclassic 103

vote type 1 1 004

All shook up

By Anonymous - 08/12/2025 09:00

Today, my friend's brother is severely gorgeous. He is also off-limits because she isn't very fond of him. I also don't want her to think I'm using her to get with him because she's a newer friend and I didn't know she had a brother until I saw him, and I'd rather be her friend than his girlfriend… BUT HE'S BEAUTIFUL. FML

agreeclassic 253

vote type 1 211

Stiffed

By Anonymous - 04/12/2025 22:00

Today, I called my usual babysitter, one of the few people who can handle my difficult kids, to ask her to watch them for a night next week. She refused. It turns out my wife has been repeatedly underpaying her and she's fed up with it. So long date nights, I guess. FML

agreeclassic 226

vote type 1 399

Thanks not given much

By Anonymous - 29/11/2025 20:00

Today, I sadly woke to a realization: Even on Thanksgiving and my baby girl's birthday, their dad's idea of a family day is constantly sitting there "trying to feel less sick" and just ignore us all, or as he says it, "time is all out" and playing Pokemon GO. Awesome. If I say anything, he threatens to leave. FML

agreeclassic 330

vote type 1 126

2 fast, 2 braincells

By Negative aura - 21/12/2025 00:00

Today, I was in a parking lot, doing donuts in my dad's car to rizz some baddies. It was going great until some dumbass got in the way and got launched twenty feet. I panicked, lost control of the car, and smashed into a decorative tree. FML

agreeclassic 48

vote type 1 1 005

Kinda weird

By Cassie - 30/11/2025 03:00

Today, I turned 15, and I am allowed to wear a bikini now, so I modeled for my family. My brother (who's 18) was really wowed when he saw me. I asked what's wrong; he said, "Nothing, which is the point. I know you're my sis, not my girlfriend, but damn you have a pretty body." Is it OK that my bro thinks I'm hot? FML

agreeclassic 437

vote type 1 165

Good luck with that

By Anonymous - 12/12/2025 20:00

Today, I got an email from a company that fired me over two weeks ago. It turns out they forgot to download all my work before deleting my account, and they want me to get it back off the cloud. FML

agreeclassic 376

vote type 1 66

Single dad struggles

By Just kids being kids - 02/12/2025 12:00

Today, I lost yet another girlfriend because of my kids’ behavior. The last one told me, “I’d rather get fisted by Freddy Krueger than deal with those hellspawn of yours!” At this point, I’m going to be a single dad forever. FML

agreeclassic 105

vote type 1 641

The more you know

By My mouth tastes like blood - 14/12/2025 22:00

Today, I was able to get dental care for the first time in 4 years. I had been going through all the hygiene motions, but without professional input all that time, no one was there to warn me about the sour candies I had been eating, and how they ruined your teeth anyway. My teeth are well beyond salvageable now. FML

agreeclassic 150

vote type 1 381

Congrats!

By Bittersweet - this FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, after 10 years of frequent international air travel, I got my seat upgraded for the very first time. Also, for the very first time in 10 years, the airline lost my luggage. FML

agreeclassic 2 064

vote type 1 167

Oh wow, that's rude

By Nena - 26/12/2025 03:00

Today, I posted a meme on Facebook that said, “Dear Santa, I want a man who’s at least 6ft tall, abs, can plan dates, texts back, has a job and a car.” A friend of mine commented, “Dear Santa, I want a girl under 150lbs, no kids, no emotional baggage, self sufficient and doesn’t bitch 24/7.” His comment got 25 likes. FML

agreeclassic 86

vote type 1 660

Hogwatch

By Anonymous - 05/12/2025 00:00

Today, I was once again berated by an idiotic parent. I’ve been called a filthy liberal, a groomer, and had my job threatened several times. All of this because I was teaching second graders about pronouns. You know, the part of English grammar that replaces a noun. Nothing political at all. FML

agreeclassic 508

vote type 1 117

Anger management

By limeiscool - this FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, about to fall asleep, a bug started buzzing behind the screen to my window. Losing my sanity, I punched the screen, forgetting all about the glass. I now have a cracked window and one still annoying bug. FML

agreeclassic 625

vote type 1 2 391

Better happy and fat

By Anonymous - 05/12/2025 03:00

Today, I've zero motivation to even live life. I've stopped doing even the little things I like. My husband tries hard to cheer me up and keep things going, but I just want to curl into a ball and die. I'm too scared to take depression medication as it makes me fat. FML

agreeclassic 272

vote type 1 350

Coming and going

By Anonymous - 07/12/2025 00:00

Today, after my relationship ended in a shambles, my partner finally moved out and we were broken up, now, just as I started talking to others and feeling OK with being alone, she revealed that the break was temporary and that she has to move back in temporarily. FML

agreeclassic 235

vote type 1 263

Dad of the week

By Fuck u brian - 07/12/2025 03:00

Today, I picked up my son, who was recently diagnosed with ARFID (avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder), from my ex-husband. My ex said, "Yeah, he's over that bullshit eating thing. I told him no video games or TV unless he tried something new at every meal." I hate this smug fucking prick. FML

agreeclassic 168

vote type 1 611

Recluse

By Anonymous - 09/12/2025 03:00

Today, I realized I am the neighborhood pariah. I have a vaca house on a lake, and every year the neighborhood holds a Friendsgiving Party. I wasn't invited. I only found out it that it happened when I saw the Facebook photos. I have no idea why I was excluded. I must be the world's biggest a-hole. FML

agreeclassic 281

vote type 1 127

Isn't she lovely?

By Anonymous - 14/12/2025 12:00

Today, my wife shouted at me for never doing anything for her, which is a brave claim to make while her unemployed ass sits in the house I pay for, enjoying the Netflix I pay for, and the car I pay for so she can drive to Starbucks and use my money to buy £8 coffees for six friends at once. FML

agreeclassic 457

vote type 1 132

I mean, come on…

By Anonymous - 19/12/2025 20:00

Today, I went to see a movie but took my phone out a few times to check my socials. Apparently the asshole behind me didn’t like that, because he ripped my phone out of my hands, dropped it in my soda, then just sat back in his seat like nothing happened. FML

agreeclassic 77

vote type 1 1 239

Oh no!

By Anonymous - 30/11/2025 09:00

Today, I had gotten a Costco style pumpkin pie and whipped cream for Thanksgiving dinner. My mom and stepdad ended up so stuffed from the main course of the dinner that they didn't want the pie. I got that stuff for them specifically. I'll have to eat the pie myself so it doesn't go to waste. FML

agreeclassic 232

vote type 1 170

Little shit

By Tired mommy - 11/12/2025 00:00

Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML

agreeclassic 109

vote type 1 553

Haunted by you

By Anonymous - 19/12/2025 22:00

Today, I asked my daughter if we could have a memorial table at her wedding for her baby brother who died 21 years ago. To my horror, she lost her shit at me and screamed she wants “one fucking night” to be about her and “not about him.” FML

agreeclassic 82

vote type 1 1 560

Tattoo backstory needed

By Anonymous - 05/12/2025 22:00

Today, I got my boyfriend naked for the first time. He had "Baby Fucker" tattooed over his groin. He had some weird explanation for it, but I couldn't stop thinking about him fucking a baby, and it turned me off massively. I don't think I can keep dating him. FML

agreeclassic 310

vote type 1 64

Gamer boy

By I married a child - 20/12/2025 03:00

Today, I watched my 35 year-old husband start up a new video game. He named his character "Boner." FML

agreeclassic 174

vote type 1 315

Bled dry

By Anonymous - 11/12/2025 15:00

Today, my ex-husband stopped paying his child support so when I phoned to threaten him with lawyers, he didn’t care. Apparently, he lost his job months ago and has been paying me out of his savings, but now he has absolutely nothing left I can take away from him. Now I feel bad. FML

agreeclassic 164

vote type 1 504

Good deed of the day

By Anonymous - 20/12/2025 15:00

Today, my distant relatives found out that I had turned down an inheritance from my long estranged father. I didn't feel it was right so I asked the lawyer to make it a donation to WFP. Relatives I'd never met and some I didn't even know about are now all over my socials about how I "insulted the memory" of their uncle. FML

agreeclassic 376

vote type 1 101

Rebel

By God help me - 08/12/2025 12:00

Today, my 15 year-old daughter decided that the best way to indulge her rebellious impulses was to sleep with the 30-something convict down the street, get pregnant, and try to convince him to let her move in. FML

agreeclassic 474

vote type 1 116

Stay out of it

By Muddy - 28/12/2025 00:00

Today, my disgusting coworker made a comment about "women versus accountability" and I couldn't even yell at him for being a sexist scumbucket, because my wife threw coffee at me yesterday for pointing out that she'd left the chips open and they went stale. FML

agreeclassic 129

vote type 1 280

Guess not

By Unmerry xmas - 26/12/2025 09:00

Today, at a Christmas party, I chatted up a hot girl. She acted indifferent and uninterested so I took the hint and stopped. Moments later, another guy chats her up and they seemingly hit it off. At the end of the party, I heard her brag to her friends how they exchanged numbers. I guess I’m not good enough for her. FML

agreeclassic 131

vote type 1 489

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I went fishing with my dad. I figured, since we were out on the dock, I may as well get rid of my farmer's tan. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up to a fishing net draped over me. I now have a fishnet pattern down the front of my body. FML

agreeclassic 43 910

vote type 1 12 509

Today, I'm being evicted from my apartment for not paying rent. My father is the on-site landlord, meaning I now have to move my stuff downstairs into his place, and hear every day how I'm a failure. FML

agreeclassic 16 134

vote type 1 45 653

Today, I cleaned out the fridge for my mother. I didn't throw out a single thing that was less than a month past its expiration. Instead of thanks, she complained about everything that I threw away being still good, including a tub of butter that had been expired for two years. FML

agreeclassic 29 358

vote type 1 2 613

Today, I set out to clean the house while my wife was at work. Starting with the vacuum cleaner, it suddenly started making a strange noise and emitting a burning smell. Panicking, I unplugged it and noticed one of our toddler's socks had been sucked into it, causing it to overheat. I managed to extract the sock, but now our expensive vacuum cleaner is toast. FML

agreeclassic 630

vote type 1 207

Today, I was at my job where we buy precious metals. A man came in and said, "Here, I have something special for you." He then pulled a tooth out of his mouth that had dental gold on it and placed in it my bare hand. Yeah, special indeed. FML

agreeclassic 3 991

vote type 1 314

Today, I got my son's phone bill (the phone I got him to call us from college). I found out he's been calling a phone sex hotline everyday. He hasn't called us once. FML

agreeclassic 42 751

vote type 1 8 702