"Your degree will open so many doors" By Lewis - 18/12/2018 00:30 The way I live determined, that was a lie! I agree, your life sucks 223 You deserved it 114 Share Tweet Share
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML I agree, your life sucks 79 407 You deserved it 4 334
Today, my birthday is in two weeks. I began looking up significant events that occurred on my birthday just to feel as though it actually matters to someone. Few of my friends remember it, and the ones that do have trouble trying to squeeze it into their schedules without screwing up their Christmas plans. FML I agree, your life sucks 751 You deserved it 131
Today, while dreaming, I was thirsty and grabbed a glass of water to drink. The taste was so horrible that it caused me to wake up and realize I was drinking the isopropyl alcohol I keep on my nightstand for my CPAP machine. All Poison Control had to say was, "Uh oh." FML I agree, your life sucks 3 794 You deserved it 616
Today, I'm on the last few days of my period. After nothing came out the whole day, a dollop of blood suddenly poured out, somehow managed to entirely circumvent the giant pad I was wearing, and went straight into my underwear, pants, and the chair I was sitting on. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 507 You deserved it 160
Today, I tried to create the perfect playlist for a road trip. I spent a long while curating it, but when I hit the shuffle button, it started playing a bunch of annoying nursery rhymes. Apparently, I'd accidentally merged my list with my nephew's. FML I agree, your life sucks 356 You deserved it 218
Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML I agree, your life sucks 61 084 You deserved it 5 836