Love Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and... - FML

Anonymous - 15/08/2012 00:12 - United States

Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML

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St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! …

CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

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yoked - 18/12/2009 03:48 - United States

Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML

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Love is in the air

Rydia - 31/10/2020 05:01

Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML

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DSM - 14/03/2009 11:05 - United States

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

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Romance is dead

Anonymous - 07/09/2009 06:05 - United States

Today, at my girlfriend's place, I cleaned up her room, put candles everywhere, scented the air, and placed rose petals all over her bed in an attempt to be romantic and loving. The first thing she said when she saw all this was, "Uhhhhgg, I'll have to clean all this up." FML

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maebyf - 31/08/2010 14:48 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

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Anonymous - 26/10/2012 07:23 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML

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allgassedout - 04/01/2015 00:23 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

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Nervous

amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

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ThisIsMyLife - 04/06/2017 04:00

Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML

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sheerem 7

Wednesday 15 August 2012 5:15

She probably just had diarrhea and didn't want to crap her pants in front of you. Don't take it too seriously.

zachlibby 4

Wednesday 15 August 2012 5:13

Nothing more romantic than a fart.

Sicilysstallion 2

Monday 20 August 2012 22:25

When you gotta to , you gotta to

doglover100 28

Thursday 22 November 2012 17:46

Girls do fart. She feels comfortable around you enough to fart in front of you.

bakerella 29

Thursday 27 December 2012 22:48

why are you saying FML at this? she obviously had an upset stomach

unlucky_lucy 17

Saturday 24 August 2013 20:15

At least she feels comfortable enough to fart around you.. Or she is testing to see how committed you really are

JoseIsAdork 31

Thursday 5 September 2013 6:46

that's when you squeeze your butt cheeks together, forget the damn Charmin!

aboynamedjude 8

Thursday 2 June 2016 15:18

The need to use the bathroom doesn't always come at the most convenient time. Get over yourself OP, it's part of life.

Pineapple_Salad 14

Thursday 9 June 2016 13:40

That is actually my life goal

feckery101 5

Friday 22 July 2016 23:10

she probably had to shit like every other female does. if your gonna be with her the rest of your life, you better get used to her farts.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my flatmate took his hour plus long shower while we both tried to get ready for work. I had a choice to wet myself or pee in a cooking pot. I chose the pot. FML

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Today, the boy I've liked for the past 8 years asked me out and then dumped me when he realized that I was taller than he was. FML

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Today, while at football practice, my teammates and I were on water break. At the bus barn next to the field, a good-looking girl was washing a bus. Some of the guys started to yell pick-up lines at her from 50 yards away, and pretty soon I chime in. She turns around. It was my younger sister. FML

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Today, I was painting the bathroom door post. A drop of paint fell on the toilet roll. Guess how I found out. FML

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Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML

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Today, I pulled into a parking lot, for the car to simply shut off because I ran out of gas. Then I couldn't get the key out of the ignition, so I called my dad, who walked all the way to where I was, only to find out that the car was still in drive. FML

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