Today, my wife's punition was to eat front of me, without letting... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By "naas1201" - 14/11/2019 10:48

Today, my wife's punition was to eat front of me, without letting me eat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22

You deserved it 42

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

user53658 15

Thursday 14 November 2019 13:49

Are you a man or a mouse?

jbuckets_404 38

Friday 15 November 2019 2:42

Yes.

Comments

user53658 15

Thursday 14 November 2019 13:49

Are you a man or a mouse?

jbuckets_404 38

Friday 15 November 2019 2:42

Yes.

jbuckets_404 38

Friday 15 November 2019 2:39

Well, why would you want to eat anyway while she's "eating front of you," ie, giving you a ********? And why was your wife being punished in the first place (regardless of whether or not she enjoys giving oral sex)? (Or you might just want to double-check your post first for grammar/ missing words before submitting. I've been making a lot of errors lately typing, too. :-(

shannon2348 14

Monday 18 November 2019 0:15

I'm really curious as to how she can stop you from eating. ydi

Sady_Ct 37

Friday 29 November 2019 18:26

Our punishment is having to read your crappy spelling.

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, I went to an ATM intending to withdraw $150. I approached the machine, inserted my card, typed in my pin and followed the prompts. When my card came out, I removed it, put it in my pocket and drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 894

You deserved it 22 796

Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. The only way I could have gotten pregnant is from having gotten drunk and sleeping with my ex. We broke up because I didn't want children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 843

You deserved it 54 846

Today, after my dad ran off 15 years ago, during which time my mom died, and I had to become my brother's legal guardian and somehow get both me and then him through university while working 4 jobs, my dad turned up on our street. He tried to flirt with me, because he didn’t recognise me. Scumbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 436

You deserved it 109

Today, my family had dinner with my future in-laws for the first time. After a bottle of wine to herself, my mother loudly insisted that I'm out of her will. Apparently, I "molest towels" and leave them to "fester for days" in my "den of depravity." I'm sure they'll give me their daughter now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 474

You deserved it 3 316

Today, my mum's boyfriend came back from a job up-state. He is now walking around the house in boxers to "show off his tan". He has a beer gut and a hairy back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 770

You deserved it 3 427

Today, my mum started yelling at me for leaving scissors on my desk, which my five year-old sister found and chopped all her hair off. She had a lump of hair as proof. After three minutes of her yelling, me crying and apologizing, she laughed and said she was joking. She'd just given my sister a haircut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 078

You deserved it 5 224