Kids: Today, my seven-year-old son put a spider in the microwave. Animal...

By SpiderFather - 02/07/2013 08:01 - France

Today, my seven-year-old son put a spider in the microwave. Animal cruelty? No. The goal was to irradiate it, then get it to bite him so that he would become Spider-Man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 46

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

lhazz11 23

Tuesday 2 July 2013 18:56

At least he's creative

Nolimit2217 32

Tuesday 2 July 2013 18:56

I like his style.

Comments

Lumen94 10

Tuesday 2 July 2013 20:40

That kid Is so epic!

rety1 13

Tuesday 2 July 2013 20:42

Wrong kind of radiation. That kind just heats things up it doesn't give special powers or extra limbs or any cool stuff.

JanisEvans 10

Tuesday 2 July 2013 20:46

That's actually cool. FHL, he deserves a cooler dad.

perdix 29

Tuesday 2 July 2013 20:52

#11, and spray Silly String all over his hands and play it off like he had a Spidey Nocturnal Emission (TM).

thepretender10 4

Tuesday 2 July 2013 20:54

let me know how that turns out

accountnamevalid 3

Tuesday 2 July 2013 21:08

He understands the basic concept of irradiation, and he's not afraid of spiders. He will do well in life.

ShakeDisPlace 10

Tuesday 2 July 2013 21:13

Spidey scenses are tingling OP!

Whiplash169 22

Tuesday 2 July 2013 21:16

Your son is a badass.

exlexx 12

Tuesday 2 July 2013 21:20

woow. a brilliant kid :)

uoeno_fml 20

Tuesday 2 July 2013 21:24

Only you...

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I kissed my crush for the first time and immediately started sneezing uncontrollably. It turns out that I’m allergic to his perfume. He laughed while I tried to blow my nose without looking insane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 78

Today, I was working as a waitress at a wedding. I was trying to clear the tables as quickly as possible and decided to place a half bowl of soup on top of the pile of plates I was carrying. As I was hurrying back to the kitchen I tripped and spilt the soup all over the bride's ivory dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 927

You deserved it 27 243

Today, my girlfriend dumped me by text for another man while I was at work. While I worked the drive-thru, a customer noticed me choking back my tears and said "I'd be cryin' too if I worked your dead-end job." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 236

You deserved it 2 301

Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 896

You deserved it 5 109

Today, the guy I’ve had a crush on for ever declined a date with me to see the new Deadpool & Wolverine movie because he isn’t interested in dating. I decided to go to see the movie on my own. I ran into him at the same screening I went to, all cozied up with another girl. What the hell does she have that I don’t? FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 552

Today, I think I figured out why my computer refused to start up properly the other day. My cat is a cord chewer. Now I have to close the door when I'm not in there, until I drum it into his head to not do that. And before you ask: yes, he's orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 145