Miscellaneous: Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero,...

By Coldsnap - 12/08/2011 17:25 - Sweden

Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero, saying it was just another pepper. The burning in my mouth was unbearable, but nothing compared to when I took a shit later in the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 864

You deserved it 5 018

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Same thing different taste

Hot Hot Hot

By Cliff - 13/02/2022 16:00

Today, I nearly burnt a hole in my esophagus because I couldn’t stand my dad’s taunts about me not being able to stomach ghost pepper hot sauce. Irony is a cruel bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 1 139

Weird flex but OK

By Chad - 10/06/2025 03:00 - Canada

Today, I confidently told my friends I had a high spice tolerance and took a shot of insanely hot ghost pepper sauce. I immediately hiccuped, tears started streaming down my cheeks, and I coughed so hard I fell off my chair and knocked stuff off of the table. We were in a restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57

You deserved it 801

Gross out

By Autocorrected - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Philippines - Makati

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 797

You deserved it 3 475

Was it worth it?

By Anonymous - 05/09/2023 00:02

Today, I had a stomach bug, but despite it I swallowed a mouthful of habanero sauce on a dare. I ended up projectile vomiting on a wall outside, lost my sense of balance and fell over on the sidewalk, almost blacked out from the tightness in my chest, and had to refuse an ambulance that somebody had called. All for $5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 137

You deserved it 1 310

Pranks are shit

By milk plz - 13/02/2026 12:00

Today, my wife got me back for hiding a realistic tarantula replica in her underwear drawer. She ground up hot peppers and horseradish and shoved it in my mouth while I slept. I woke up screaming in pain and went to the hospital before she confessed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 392

Zero stars on Trip Advisor

By Anonymous - 01/03/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I have an awful stomach virus. I can only drink liquids and can't eat anything solid, especially anything spicy. My dad forced me to eat the fajitas he'd made for dinner and screamed at me when I told him I couldn't, then screamed at me again for "wasting food" when I predictably threw up all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 665

You deserved it 91

Spicy shit

By DMStarsky - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 904

You deserved it 4 827

By Anonymous - 26/09/2013 16:19 - United States - East Hampton

Today, I watched in horror as my dad picked up a dead centipede, placed it on his tongue, and then swallowed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 785

You deserved it 3 613

Not again!

By green and not with envy - 13/06/2014 20:17 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying, "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 802

You deserved it 5 806

Pucker up

By It feels fucking awful - 18/12/2025 12:00

Today, on a whim, I decided to try to light a fart on fire. I now know how it feels to take a dump when you have a burn directly on your asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52

You deserved it 650

unluckiestperson_fml 14

Friday 12 August 2011 23:19

With a name like "Tasmanian habanero", I'd steer clear.

iluvboobies 9

Friday 12 August 2011 23:18

tough shit

Comments

RuCheezBurger 10

Friday 12 August 2011 23:24

When I read this I was like: Soooo the sh// was good then?

LuukBaas 0

Friday 12 August 2011 23:25

why does no one have more than 1 thumb up?

beanieboy0789 0

Friday 12 August 2011 23:26

Don't be a bitch.

FlashBurn 13

Friday 12 August 2011 23:32

Holy hell! I bet that was fun. I munch on hot peppers though, they're tasty.

Somoajoe11 2

Saturday 13 August 2011 0:27

I bet you do.

mfort312 0

Friday 12 August 2011 23:34

Twice spicy!

thatnucca 36

Friday 12 August 2011 23:35

You just enacted the phrase "Burns like shit"... Now here are 10 Microsoft points...

ben9694 0

Friday 12 August 2011 23:35

I know how you feel. Never touch you dick after you have touched one either. It burns!

ramboman19 8

Friday 12 August 2011 23:37

I know that feeling! The WORST! but be careful when eating peppers. Don't just eat it without knowing for sure what it is.

LizzieBvBfan 5

Friday 12 August 2011 23:39

Why is everybody thumbing down the puns? Okay maybe they are pretty crappy...

Calyx_fml 21

Friday 12 August 2011 23:40

It's even spicier the third and fourth times...

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Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 253

You deserved it 3 517

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I agree, your life sucks 9 631

You deserved it 845

Today, I pulled out a book and my bookmark fell out. My crush picked it up and a weird look came across his face. I then realized I had used toilet paper. Now I'm the girl who reads while taking dumps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 678

You deserved it 6 800

Today, I found out my fiancé has been sleeping with his therapist behind my back. If that wasn't bad enough on its own, I'd talked him into starting therapy six months ago to help with his mental health troubles, and have been mostly paying for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 419

You deserved it 237

Today, the kids in my 6 year-old daughter’s class were asked what they feared the most. My daughter’s worst fear is apparently not werewolves, sharks, monsters or clowns. Nope, it’s "Eating food I don’t like." FML

I agree, your life sucks 736

You deserved it 225

Today, my mum picked up a bunch of tissues that were scattered around my room. She examined them, then asked me to stop wasting her potential grandchildren. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 627

You deserved it 44 262

Same thing different taste

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