Intimacy: Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while and realized...

By Anonymous - 12/05/2009 23:08 - United States

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while and realized that I can lift way more with my left hand than with my right even though I am right handed. I also realized that I jack off with my left hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 016

You deserved it 59 026

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 19:18 - United States

Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 751

You deserved it 37 995

I have no idea what I'm doing

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 10:00

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months and couldn't figure out how to use any of the equipment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 328

By dawg3360 - 07/06/2009 06:02 - Canada

Today, I noticed I have to lift up my fat to see my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 649

You deserved it 134 237

By likeyourboss - 04/10/2013 16:05 - Denmark

Today, I went to the gym. I tried out a new machine where you do one-arm weightlifting. I took my time to get into a good position, then set the machine to the lowest weight possible. I couldn't even lift it an inch. A bunch of buff guys nearby saw me and burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 740

You deserved it 5 956

Getting on

By Anonymous - 01/05/2021 23:00

Today, I realized that I’m old, and that it’s been too long since I had sex or even masturbated. How did I notice? Because I tried to, and I found out I couldn’t comfortably spread my legs that far anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 300

By Anonymous - 24/01/2017 20:00

Today, my hand fell asleep while I was masturbating. My own body rejected me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 879

You deserved it 1 628

Overdoing it a bit

By Anonymous - 12/11/2022 16:00

Today, I masturbated so hard I got a cramp in my forearm muscle so unexpectedly that my hand spasmed, slipped off my penis, and I punched myself in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 1 206

By Delilah - 01/03/2010 08:53 - Norway

Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 859

You deserved it 9 790

Take it easy

By Endrit Begolli - 27/06/2023 00:02 - Albania

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. I was so out of shape that I couldn't even finish my warm-up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 256

By tomchuq - 30/08/2009 07:12 - United States

Today, I realized I can hold a pencil in my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 670

You deserved it 61 263

Nyxen 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 12:37

That's pretty impressive really. Maybe you should switch it up from time to time, and then you'd be able to do serious lifting with both arms.

wollzilla 0

Wednesday 13 May 2009 12:35

hahah same. i lose arm wrestling when i use my right hand, but whenever i use my left, i own.

Comments

YUMMYFRENCHFRIES 16

Monday 15 July 2013 8:20

Only awesome people are left handed...like me:D

jennifertayli 8

Thursday 29 August 2013 15:32

jacking off makes your hand stronger

fuzzypanda321 7

Monday 3 November 2014 21:01

no shit i choke the chicken with my right and i can lift a ton more

laughingtoohard 14

Monday 26 January 2015 3:56

I rotate between the two hands

tiggerdoc 14

Friday 19 June 2015 17:35

GO AWAY! 'Baitin!!

vb68_fml 28

Saturday 21 November 2015 4:05

What an exciting FML! Wonder how this one got through moderation...

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