Today, I’ve always feared that I had a very small penis. That... - FML

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By TinyRick - 28/01/2018 11:31

Today, I’ve always feared that I had a very small penis. That fear was confirmed after the girl I was seeing dumped me, and told all our mutual friends that I do indeed have a tiny dick. FML.

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interesting33 36

Monday 29 January 2018 23:32

that is however a standard insult which she might have only said because she knows it upsets all guys and is accepted as an insult. like calling a girl ugly. I think most girls will believe it. Her feeling the need today anything at all however, suggests she is bitter and it is not a kind thing.

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interesting33 36

Monday 29 January 2018 23:32

that is however a standard insult which she might have only said because she knows it upsets all guys and is accepted as an insult. like calling a girl ugly. I think most girls will believe it. Her feeling the need today anything at all however, suggests she is bitter and it is not a kind thing.

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Today, I found out that eating too much cheese really can cause nightmares. I had a cheese sandwich before bed and woke up later to the nightmarish sight of my mother-in-law standing over me with a suitcase. She had a big argument with her husband and wants to stay with us for a few weeks. FML

agreeclassic 2 813

vote type 1 273

Today, it's been several weeks since I unfortunately had to tell my grandpa that I wouldn't make it to his birthday party due to jury duty. It's now the day before, which also happens to be his birthday, and I just discovered that I was excused due to them having extras and replacing me. Too late now. FML

agreeclassic 393

vote type 1 123

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML

agreeclassic 76 382

vote type 1 13 490

Today, my siblings came home for the weekend. At dinner, my dad started complaining at how one of my siblings had gotten fired, one was failing college, and the other was gay. He went on to say I was 17 and already had a bright future. I'm pregnant. FML

agreeclassic 49 944

vote type 1 61 470

Today, I had the closing shift at work in a café and there was a man and lady left. I made them coffee and started to close up. When the lady finished her coffee, she grabbed my arm and said, "I think that man is masturbating" and leaves in a hurry. I had to wait for him to finish before closing. FML

agreeclassic 65 913

vote type 1 4 342

Today, my mom spent over $200 getting me tested for every drug in the book. All because I admitted to smoking a single cigarette two years ago. FML

agreeclassic 51 720

vote type 1 7 972