Health: Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML

By heheheh - 22/08/2011 06:43 - Canada

Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 985

You deserved it 57 750

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Same thing different taste

By numbtongue - 13/03/2015 04:19 - New Zealand - Dunedin

Today, as I was trying to remove my lunch from the hot oven tray, my finger brushed against the metal for a moment, and I instinctively put it in my mouth. I burnt my tongue, on my finger. I didn't realize that was possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 899

You deserved it 4 475

By jerkgirl - 08/04/2009 05:18 - United States

Today, while getting my hair done, I was annoyed that the beautician was not paying attention while straightening my hair. After asking her three times to watch what she was doing, I grabbed the iron and said "let me do it, you're going to burn me!". I then burned two layers of skin off my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 747

You deserved it 113 312

By beatricesank - 23/05/2009 14:03 - Canada

Today, I was straightening my hair when I heard this crunching, sizzling sound. Taking the flat iron away, I realized that I had just fused a spider to my hair with the heat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 013

You deserved it 6 653

By anonymous - 12/03/2012 08:03 - United States

Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 685

You deserved it 27 519

By StayPositive - 03/11/2010 00:57 - United States

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 497

You deserved it 9 626

By thatchick3333 - 08/03/2012 07:13 - United States

Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 495

You deserved it 6 973

By Username - 09/05/2011 17:23 - China

Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a workmate, I took a sip of the tea, which I had forgotten was boiling hot, and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 252

You deserved it 10 558

By crayons128 - 24/01/2011 06:13 - United States

Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 061

You deserved it 6 606

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 05:44 - United States

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 222

You deserved it 52 417

Testing, testing

By BubbaYoshi117 - 07/01/2020 20:00 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 1 289

DoubleEdgedBlade 4

Monday 22 August 2011 11:53

How the hell did you manage to do that?

chuchurocket 4

Monday 22 August 2011 11:58

Next time you "practice", unplug it.

Comments

njgohard 16

Monday 22 August 2011 14:56

You expect me to feel sorry for you?

DomoLaDii 8

Monday 22 August 2011 14:57

lmfao SMART 1 !!!!!!

Btreasure 8

Monday 22 August 2011 15:15

I don't that's where your supposed to put it.

Btreasure 8

Monday 22 August 2011 15:15

I don't that's where your supposed to put it.

evanedwards85 6

Monday 22 August 2011 15:21

you're just a retard lol enough said

HannahGoose14 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 3:58

hot abs!

Killerturtle 11

Monday 22 August 2011 15:23

I'm really curious of what OP was trying to accomplish with this.

zcheema17 0

Monday 22 August 2011 15:31

How?!?!

Lipsforbiting 7

Monday 22 August 2011 15:32

How does that even happen?

biancanick1 0

Monday 22 August 2011 15:35

W t f is wrong with u?

nosferatu4444 10

Monday 22 August 2011 15:39

how would this happen?

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The Top

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 141

You deserved it 14 383

Today, while playing with a group of kids at the school where I work, I heard an immense rip. I looked down and recoiled in shock as I noticed a gaping maw in my pants stretching from my ass to my left kneecap. I had to finish the rest of the day and walk home like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 126

You deserved it 1 906

Today, I was on a date, when I suddenly choked on my own saliva and coughed so hard that I passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 278

You deserved it 5 166

Today, we live in a society where an Uber Eats order arrives a lot faster than the authorities. To make things worse, the Uber Eats order arrives screwed up as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 136

Today, my friends and I had our Christmas party. I ended up being the only one sober, and had to drive each and every person home. There were 15 of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 542

You deserved it 5 819

Today, the girl I've been dating for several months, and fallen in love with, said "We're just friends, right? My mom thinks I'm leading you on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 943

You deserved it 4 894

Same thing different taste

Testing, testing

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