Love: Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by... - FML

By Anonymous - 27/09/2013 20:33 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 035

You deserved it 4 559

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Same thing different taste

By ouch - 16/06/2016 10:14 - United States - Livonia

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was so angry, she stabbed me in the hand with a plastic fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 399

You deserved it 2 021

By HttpsHaileyy - 15/06/2015 20:02 - United States

Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 804

You deserved it 9 595

By Anonymous - 03/12/2012 11:53 - Canada

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 116

You deserved it 4 201

By traumatised - 11/10/2009 16:16 - United Kingdom

Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 500

You deserved it 2 796

Not so anal retentive then…

By Anonymous - 03/02/2017 22:00 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 363

You deserved it 747

By deadhamster - 03/02/2012 18:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 460

You deserved it 5 057

By Anonymous - 29/10/2012 05:46 - United States

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 137

You deserved it 28 817

By starfishedasshole - 30/03/2014 16:50 - United States

Today, I broke up with my psycho girlfriend of one month. She actually expected me to let her keep the vintage car that I've been rebuilding for the past two years, and when I refused, she threatened to burn my garage down with us still in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 097

You deserved it 4 352

Public freakout

By kingpin9219 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend in a crowded mall. I thought this was a good idea, until she went ballistic, began screaming and crying, and then stabbed me in the stomach with a ballpoint pen. I got banned from the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 258

You deserved it 52 810

By bTOhno - 13/08/2011 06:37 - United States

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 083

You deserved it 4 735

Next

Top comments

vrossie_ 15

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:03

Can't you call then cops for that? ..

123amanda123 14

Saturday 28 September 2013 5:04

the poor hamster! :(

Comments

rachel2100 6

Monday 20 July 2015 8:51

Omfg!!! The hamster!! Sue her or something!

HarryBoles 13

Tuesday 21 July 2015 7:41

PLEASE sue that bitch

herpderp1234 17

Thursday 6 August 2015 14:49

Dang. Make sure you call the cops for breaking and entering and attempted murder bruh. And while you're at it file a restraining order and sue her for the damages.

shonic 16

Tuesday 22 September 2015 19:30

animal abuse and breaking and entering. you my friend can sue her and make her pay in 2 ways

NotSoAmazingJo 6

Saturday 26 September 2015 17:27

No! That's horrible. You should call someone, 1 because she harmed your property, and 2, she was abusive!

Teacatt 13

Friday 11 December 2015 10:00

Police!! Now!!

briedabro 32

Sunday 18 September 2016 9:51

That's awful.

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Tuesday 24 October 2017 7:05

Don't date a f*cking yandere!

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Today, it's been a few months ago since we finally got the divorce we’ve wanted for years. He seems to have forgotten our shared photo library as he just uploaded a bunch of photos of all his disgusting sexual exploits, including the threesome he always wanted. Meanwhile, I can’t get so much as a second date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 327

Today, I found out that whenever my roommate's friend-with-benefits comes over, he uses my bikini trimmer to shave his pubic hair. I've been using that trimmer for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 131

You deserved it 1 283

Today, my friends told me all five of us should bring sleeping bags on our field trip; I brought mine only to find out they had told me that so they would get the four beds to themselves. They all 'forgot' to bring them and its only fair that I should sleep on the floor. We are here for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 190

You deserved it 4 466

Today, I accidentally sent a dick pic to my coach instead of my girlfriend. He sent one back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 243

You deserved it 6 219

Today, my boyfriend called and told me he had a surprise for me and to meet up with him to find out. The big surprise was a consultation with a plastic surgeon for rhinoplasty surgery. I never disliked my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 054

You deserved it 2 582

Today, my family and I were discussing my birthday in a couple weeks. As they asked what I wanted, I told them it was up to them. So my mother suggested that she'll get me electrolysis so I wouldn't have to worry about my mustache in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 771

You deserved it 5 142