Animals, Poopoo peepee and Cats: Still better than the Cats movie - FML

Still better than the Cats movie

By dirty deeds - 31/05/2020 14:00

Today, my brother’s cat pissed on my brand new bed. He refuses to replace the mattress, and claims it wasn’t his cat. We only have one cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 509

You deserved it 157

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Same thing different taste

Cats gonna cat

By Anonymous - 18/09/2019 14:00

Today, I got a new mattress delivered to my house. Didn’t have it on the frame for more than 5 minutes before my cat had already pissed on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 483

You deserved it 392

By All The Best People Are Crazy~ - 04/11/2016 03:49 - Canada - Oakville

Today, my cat used his expensive new bed for the first time since he got it last month. He used it as a litter box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 016

You deserved it 1 290

Precision strike

By Zodiacfall - 27/10/2019 02:00

Today, I replaced my bedsheets with new, clean ones. I went to the bathroom to wash up, and when I came back, my cat had peed exactly where my head would be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 612

You deserved it 243

By tornkhakis - 24/02/2014 07:20 - United States - Bloomington

Today, my cat decided that instead of using the brand-new scratching post I bought him, he was going to use my pant leg while I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 206

You deserved it 4 180

Smells better when turned on

By p0isonOreo68 - 24/09/2020 20:02

Today, my cat peed on my stove. There’s multiple clean litter-boxes that he could have used instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 062

You deserved it 222

Getting no pussy love

By Anonymous - 03/08/2020 05:02

Today, since getting the new kitten that only I wanted, it has scratched me and peed on my socks, my side of the bed and my laptop. It loves my husband though, who was against getting a cat at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 323

You deserved it 435

By insert pussy pun, hurr durr - 29/06/2016 17:34 - United States - Hopkinsville

Today, my boyfriend got irrationally pissed at me because his cat decided to sit on my lap instead of his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 324

You deserved it 1 157

By peevedMcGee - 23/11/2018 17:30

Today, my cat pooped on the floor. After cleaning it up, I’m fairly certain it was not my cat but instead my roommate, who I also suspect is pooping in the litter box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 946

You deserved it 225

Happy Caturday

By couchsurfer - 10/08/2012 00:02 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to allow the cats to sleep with us on the bed. As we started to cuddle, one of the cats pissed right in between us. We are sleeping on the couch until the baking soda absorbs the smell in the mattress. I'll be sleeping there longer than that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 081

You deserved it 29 974

Little devil

By Teresa - 28/05/2010 04:30 - United States

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 011

You deserved it 42 725

Next

Top comments

Kurliez408 32

Sunday 31 May 2020 17:19

why replace a brand new mattress?? there's plenty of products made just for the purpose of cleaning mattresses. you think every child who wets the bed gets a brand new mattress?

Sady_Ct 37

Sunday 31 May 2020 14:50

Wait till he is out... swap the beds, when he’s fixed it swap them back

Comments

EmmaMK 35

Wednesday 17 June 2020 23:41

Pee on your brothers bed and deny it

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Today, I was swimming in the fast lane at the pool. A guy in blue trunks was swimming slowly and really getting on everyone's nerves. I took a break, and looking around I couldn't see him. I turned to the guy next to me and said, "Finally, Mr. Blue Trunks has f**ked off." It was Mr. Blue Trunks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 569

You deserved it 39 813

Today, I had to explain to my father why it isn't a good idea to shove a metal knife into the toaster when trying to get at a small piece of toast. This man is 45-years-old and has a PhD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 931

You deserved it 3 783

Today, during a job interview, the interviewer asked me to “describe a time I overcame a challenge.” My mind went blank. After 10 seconds of silence, I blurted out, “Once, I tried to cancel my gym membership.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 140

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 870

You deserved it 3 692

Today, I went to my first university party already a little drunk. I perched on the end of a table to cool off from the dancing and the whole table tipped over and dumped me onto the floor. I was promptly laughed out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 444

You deserved it 889

Today, my husband actually was cleaning our bathrooms. I had to pee and the floor was wet in my upstairs bathroom. My wonderful husband told me to go downstairs. I did and sat on the toilet seat which felt wet. He forgot he had sprayed it with Tilex. Chemical burns on your butt are great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 454

You deserved it 3 301