Fishing Break Brake Fail! By FML Approved - 07/09/2017 03:30 Easy living isn't always easy... I agree, your life sucks 593 You deserved it 190 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML I agree, your life sucks 24 533 You deserved it 62 992
Today, I was getting ready to load my groceries in my car when my remote wouldn't work and neither would my key to unlock it. A cute young guy came over, not to help but to ask me what the hell I was doing to his car. My car, that looked exactly like his, was on the other side of the lot. FML I agree, your life sucks 22 804 You deserved it 13 555
Today, I got mauled by some wild animals and had to get my butt cheek stitched up. The embarrassment doesn't end there though; the animals in question were kittens. The nurses on duty laughed and the entire ward found out. FML I agree, your life sucks 47 137 You deserved it 7 098
Today, I dreamt that the fabric and pattern I was working on were sliding off the table so I quickly reached to grab it, effectively driving my fingers into my husband's eyes. Fuck his life too. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 021 You deserved it 120
Today, I realised that on top of my gluten intolerance, garlic intolerance, and just the general having to poop way too much in 12 hours, apparently my system does not like ice cream anymore. I get diarrhea after eating any amount. And I love Klondike bars! FML I agree, your life sucks 449 You deserved it 94
Today, I realized after turning in my resume to over 100 job openings over the past month, that the resume I've been submitting does not have my phone number or any other contact information besides my name. FML I agree, your life sucks 7 385 You deserved it 16 246
Looks like that car's sleepin' with the fishes.