Intimacy: Emergency

Emergency

By Anonymous - 03/05/2009 23:22 - United States

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of two years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

agreeclassic 307 538

vote type 1 20 918

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By Anonymous - 26/07/2011 04:30 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was over at my house for the first time. I told her I had to go take a shower, and from the other room my grandmother yells "you're not going to jack off this time are you?" FML

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Today, my boyfriend and I were on my bed when things started getting hot and it began to shake. My little sister called the entire family to the hall to listen to "the frogs in the wall". FML

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YOUNGSMUTTY 0

Monday 4 May 2009 10:08

That's sad. I hope your grandma's alright! You're such a sweet boy for going home to help her. I'll take your virginity ;) Haha jk.

shortandloud 0

Monday 4 May 2009 10:09

That sucks about not getting sex but I have to say that the whole getting stuck between the bowl and the wall is pretty hilarious.

Comments

lovvuhh 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 19:07

ohhh myyy gawd! this made me laugh so much! I hope grams is alrightt thoughh.

scottymbev 0

Friday 22 April 2011 0:15

**** blocked by grandma

Nitial 6

Thursday 28 April 2011 18:44

Maybe, just maybe, OP meant that he won't be able to make up the sex

drmarki 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 17:30

**** that I'm gettin laid

jason2076 2

Thursday 19 May 2011 17:59

sounds like something your preacher would tell you... every time you have pre-marital sex, your grandma gets injured

countrycutie955 4

Tuesday 31 May 2011 19:04

i bout pissed my pants laughing so hard

CherryBombb 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 23:27

I laughed so ******* hard at this! Poor Grandma tho. I hope she's okay and I hope your girlfriend understands.

JellyFish3000 0

Monday 13 June 2011 12:59

God gave you a sign

colorguardgeek 8

Sunday 19 June 2011 3:06

oh dear....

bobla456 0

Wednesday 22 June 2011 4:25

HELP! HELP! I've fallen and I need to shit

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