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I wasn't planning on commenting if this got published, but I decided to create an account to thank you guys for your supportive comments. I also wanted to add that I do know I'm better off, it's just difficult because we have a daughter together. Thankfully I have an amazing support system around me and I don't have to deal with this by myself

By well then... - 15/06/2013 05:04 - Canada - London

Today, as I was crossing to the US, I got pulled over by border patrol for looking "suspicious". The female cop searched my purse and found a condom. She smirked and said, "I doubt you'd ever need that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 437

You deserved it 4 797

Think ahead

By julie - 12/11/2009 01:54 - United States

Today, I realized that if you are too lazy to get completely dressed in the morning and only put on a top, you should not answer a Skype video call from your boss that involves you standing up, turning around, and grabbing files from your filing cabinet, all in clear view of your webcam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 046

You deserved it 42 663

By notgreg - 10/11/2009 15:59 - United States

Today, I found out my neighbor ordered parking tickets for everyone on the block. My car was 4 inches into his driveway, but not obstructing his exit in any way. That didn't stop him from calling in, on a Sunday, at 8 AM, an 88 dollar ticket. He also left a note "Your parking sucks, love, Greg." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 616

You deserved it 10 491

By Anonymous - 02/09/2015 15:41 - Australia

Today, I finally got the results of months of extensive psychological testing to determine why I did so well in my course but performed so terribly on the job. Turns out I'm autistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 978

You deserved it 1 778

Make yourself at home

By Anonymous - 14/02/2014 17:11 - United States - Middletown

Today, my live-in mother-in-law brazenly swiped most of the money from my wallet, then walked out of the room as if nothing had happened. The worst thing is that my wife believes anything she says, so I can't do a damn thing about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 655

You deserved it 4 584

I'm on fire

By Jyocka - 26/04/2011 22:25 - Canada

Today, on a first date, I finished eating my sushi, feeling proud to have managed chopsticks so elegantly and then rubbed my eye, oblivious to the fact I had just touched some wasabi. What followed was a classy exhibition on how to jump around screeching in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 301

You deserved it 27 146

By andi0804 - 05/08/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only call I received was from my stalker, who sang happy birthday with a japanese accent and asked if he could be my "special present". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 900

You deserved it 3 589

A long way to go…

By Anonymous - 18/11/2012 18:40 - Latvia - Riga

Today, while giving a lecture on gender equality in the workplace, a woman yelled from the back, asking me why I'm not out starting a war somewhere. I stopped talking and tried to pinpoint her in the crowd, which she took as a sign to snort and call me a pussy. Nobody would back me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 238

You deserved it 2 776

Self-esteem boost

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 00:10 - United States

Today, I have been dating an incredibly gorgeous woman. She had a poor self image and after the longest time, I finally convinced her to seek counselling to help her self esteem. It worked. So well in fact that she just broke up with me because she "finally realized she could do so much better" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 284

You deserved it 5 470

By Anonymous - 16/01/2011 05:20 - United States

Today, I'm 19 years old and, having never been on a date, I agreed to let my friend set me up. He was adorable, young, with blond hair and blue eyes...and 4 years old. My friend tricked me into babysitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 450

You deserved it 4 631

By noshow - 11/12/2014 05:44 - United States - Richardson

Today, it's the last night before a concert. Today is also the day my brother pawned my clarinet for drug money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 085

You deserved it 2 573

By justash12 - 25/08/2013 09:13 - United States - Kearny

Today, my boyfriend and I are on camping vacation. On my way out of the tent, I stepped in a pile of shit. When I told him, he said, "Oh, I couldn't make it to the bathroom last night." The bathroom was a minute walk from our tent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 819

You deserved it 3 952

justash12 tells us more.

justash12 10

Wednesday 28 August 2013 20:10

OP here following up with some details! I can not get the image of him crouching in front of the tent and taking a shit out of my head! Yes, it was a shitty situation. No, I haven't dumped him. Shoes were on! We were at a public campground, down the shore. The bathrooms have toilets, showers, sinks, and TP.