By PictureLess - 10/01/2010 17:14 - United States
The Top
By Lee - 21/06/2009 04:23 - United States
Oversharing is caring
By Lauren - 12/10/2011 17:55 - United Kingdom
By gavinbanks - 21/07/2013 22:55 - United States - Medford
gavinbanks tells us more.
By whyarewerelated - 08/09/2011 15:41 - United Kingdom
By Anonymous - 11/11/2010 08:40 - France
By hailsatan666 - 09/06/2012 18:43 - Ireland - Dublin
Think of the environment
By Anonyname - 18/05/2014 19:14 - United Kingdom
By ThisPerson - 19/05/2011 10:11 - Canada
By jill - 25/02/2014 16:59 - United States - Salt Lake City
Dodgy
By jsw029 - 26/02/2009 04:51 - United States
By ILiveWithMorons - 12/04/2011 03:07 - United States
By Anonymous - 08/02/2012 17:55 - United Kingdom
Mixed signals
By Intheway - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States
By roommateprobssss:( - 11/12/2012 15:57 - United States
By somewhatlucky - 27/12/2011 09:42 - United States
By wasliedtoasakid - 13/04/2016 02:34 - United States - Turlock
wasliedtoasakid tells us more.
Hello! OP, here. I appreciate the comments, especially the hilarious sarcasm and puns haha! :D So here's the full story: I just came out of the gym after P.E. (before the bell rang so everybody was still in class) and there was this kid like 30 ft away (going to the bathroom, I assume) and since my hair was really messy, I took out my brush, which is one of those full-size brushes that folds. So apparently this kid thought I had a pocket knife or a switchblade or something because of the way I unfolded the brush (image the same motion you would use to crack a whip or flick a wand or whatever - that's how I opened it because my hands were full). Also, I guess the kid thinks that I brush my hair with a yellow knife...? Anyway, he reported me. I got sent to the Dean and I explained what happened and showed him the "weapon." Luckily, he believed me and not that shit-for-brains kid, so I didn't actually get expelled.
FitBitch
By Anonymous - 22/02/2015 16:09 - Canada - Kitchener
By jailofc - 07/11/2012 05:48 - United States - Flagstaff
jailofc tells us more.
Hey everyone I am the OP, I am a CO at a very "nice" jail as I like to think, we treat our inmates with respect as long as they show respect back ( I didn't mean to start a political debate here haha). Basically, I thought it was stupid to be bitched out about my "customer service" because that is a very strange thing to say about a jail, where SAFETY and SECURITY should be priority. And frankly, I don't believe my *accused* criminals should be served in any other way besides providing safety and security.
By smileytheface - 06/12/2011 03:54 - United States
By tina247 - 24/01/2011 15:50
Hang up
By hangup - 04/07/2009 15:51 - United States
By Kingofbosses - 22/08/2013 05:31 - United States
You OK dude?
By dragos_dgt - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Romania
Don't listen to him
By CaoNiMa - 26/03/2009 15:42 - China
By radiating - 09/03/2012 04:53
By Anonymous - 23/05/2010 23:00 - Canada
By chiktikka - 14/01/2014 22:06 - United Kingdom
By efffmylife - 15/02/2009 21:27 - United States
efffmylife tells us more.
yeahhh it was at canes! and im a girl btw. and i thought the heftyness was implied... that is why it is an FML
By Username - 14/03/2011 06:53
Keywords
Hey everyone! Op here, thought I'd clear some things up. I had my phone on me but it was dead that night. I actually saw the girl again last night at another party, I told her the story and she have me her number again! Everything worked out for the best I guess, Thanks for the funny comments everyone!!!