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By slaya - 21/10/2018 13:30 - Bosnia and Herzegovina - Visoko

Today, I had to go to the hospital because I broke my leg in a sex accident. The doctor is my boyfriend's mom. I had to explain everything to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 759

You deserved it 625

By SonofMnemosyne - 19/11/2018 07:30 - United States

Today, I have been on the toilet all day due to chocolate laxatives from trick-or-treating. Today, it is my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 546

You deserved it 322

No, Drake, no

By dumb cats - 24/10/2020 05:01 - United States - Victorville

Today, my girlfriend and I were walking near a pond when we saw a drake forcefully mating with a duck. She burst into tears and demanded I stop them. When I told her no, that it’s just nature and thats how they breed, she dumped me for supporting and "enabling rape." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 236

You deserved it 736

WTF Mom?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Cloud

Today, my mom got drunk and told me that the man I have called dad for the past 27 years isn't my real father. Oh and don't say anything to him about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 703

You deserved it 421

Simple plan

By Crish - 22/11/2020 05:05 - Italy

Spicy

Today, I was patiently explaining to my boyfriend what I liked in bed, after several weeks of unsatisfactory sex. He snapped at me and said, "80% of women fake their orgasms. Why can't you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 183

By Anonymous - 16/02/2017 06:00 - United States - Frederick

Today, I didn't think getting egged was a thing anymore until I found that my car got egged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 347

You deserved it 448

By Bec99 - 15/02/2019 19:00 - Australia - Bassendean

Today, I found out I have celiac disease. I also happen to be a baker and will be constantly reminded of all the wheat products I can no longer enjoy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 458

You deserved it 146

By TheLostCauseFML - 17/03/2017 18:00 - United States - Hemphill

Today, I went for a walk. That's about as normal as any conversation starter gets, but it started with my boyfriend wanting me to go for walks to help lose weight. Apparently, the Universe thinks I need to lose weight too because I found this during my walk. Thanks, Universe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 502

You deserved it 569

By Wtf - 17/05/2017 22:00

Today, my estranged, psycho ex called me ten times and left belligerent messages because I didn't send him anything for his birthday yesterday like I used to. This is the same man who never gave me a birthday gift, text, or even a Happy Birthday wish during our 7 years together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 731

You deserved it 419

Honey pot

By DeadnGone01 - 05/01/2025 14:00 - United States - Miami

Today, this hot girl sent me a friend request. I accepted it and began to chat her up. She asked me if I was single. I told her I was, and proceeded to arrange a date for some drinks. Moments later, my wife sends me a screenshot of my conversation with the girl, with the caption, “Pack your shit and get the fuck out.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 2 713

Furby freakout

By furbys69 - 31/05/2017 09:00 - United States - Kingsport

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get frisky when the Furby Party Rocker all the way across the room started going off on its own and completely killed the mood. I took the batteries out of the little bastard immediately, but the mood was lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 933

You deserved it 826

By ouchies... - 06/06/2017 04:18 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, my dentist discovered that, at 21, I still had a baby tooth, and asked if I wanted it pulled. My mouth was already numb, so I said sure. Turns out the numbing wore off. The dentist pulled it anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 608

You deserved it 319

Angela K. S. Stewart tells us more.

Angela K. S. Stewart 5

Tuesday 6 June 2017 7:52

Hey y'all, op here. I submitted this while I was logged out, hence why it's not under my name. This actually happened a year ago, I'm 22 now. Thought I'd clear some stuff up. Yes, It hurt like hell. Yes,I screamed like a banshee. No. My dentist didn't notice I was in pain (how, I don't know, since his assistant literally had to hold me down to prevent me from ripping his hands out of my mouth). Yes, There was an adult tooth underneath, which they determined from x rays. Yes, I continue to see the dentist. He's actually a really good dentist and apologized profusely for this. I have a very healthy adult tooth now where the baby tooth used to be. I am, however, even more terrified of the dentist now than I was before.

'Ello 'ello 'ello

By wreckdit - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I discovered that my roommate is a drug dealer and has been keeping her product in our flat. I discovered this when several police officers broke down my bathroom door and arrested me while I was in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 256

You deserved it 792

FML Shitflix - Guess the Film!

By FML Approved - 11/07/2017 18:30 - France - Paris

We are pleased to introduce the latest addition to the FML video library: SHITFLIX! Listen carefully to the actors in this mashup of clips to figure out what movie they're describing. If you manage to guess right before the end, comment below!

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 162

By lunchbox2353 - 30/07/2019 02:00 - United States

Today, for 20 minutes, I watched my girlfriend use a mini flashlight to look for her keys in her purse. The flashlight was on her key chain. As were her keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 756

You deserved it 396

By tenniemo - 10/08/2019 14:00

Today, I caught one of my students checking out my butt while I was helping another student at his table. I teach 8th grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 488

You deserved it 432

Missing the point 101

By Anonymous - 02/10/2019 00:02

Today, I told my mom I lost 30 pounds because of an eating disorder. She told me to keep up the good work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 855

You deserved it 204

By ThanksForTheWarningDad - 22/07/2016 11:09 - United States - Wood River

Today, my dad didn't mention he had just aired up the tire on my van and that it might have a hole in it. It wasn't flat when I left the house but it sure as hell was when it exploded, not even a mile down the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 214

You deserved it 914

Christmas pictures

By Anonymous - 20/12/2019 20:00

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my mom taking nude pictures of herself in the kitchen, wearing just a Santa hat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 927

You deserved it 336

Cats > Babies

By Anonymous - 11/02/2020 14:00

Today, my husband loves his cat more than our new baby daughter. This morning, he spent two hours playing with the cat, yet when I handed him his flesh and blood daughter, he found an excuse to hand her back after five minutes, then five minutes after that he was playing with the cat again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 007

You deserved it 440

Deception

By Carlah - 17/03/2020 20:30

Today, I found out that the 19-year-old I've been seeing is really 26, with two kids and a pregnant fiancée. I'm only 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 157

You deserved it 490

By asdfghjkl - 07/04/2018 19:00

Today, it took me four tries to find the right position to swipe my debit card. My mom screamed "Oh, for God's sake, why don't you ever get it right the FIRST time?" She then apologized to the cashier for having "such a stupid child". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 098

You deserved it 932

There's a Brendon Burns joke in there somewhere

By Fucking, Impossible - 23/12/2022 11:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was attacked with the classic "I fucked your mom" joke. I calmly informed the troll that my mom is 51, obese, still married to my father after 20+ years, and, most importantly, had a life-saving hysterectomy when I was five. He still insisted that he did the act. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 1 247

Unsuitable suitor

By Anonymous - 24/08/2018 18:30

Today, during a family reunion, my daughter accused me of being a racist because I won't let her date a black guy. I do not have a racist bone in my body, but this dude is an actual gang member, and he has killed people before. Nobody believes me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 082

You deserved it 220

Sinners, the lot of you

By Anonymous - 02/09/2018 04:00

Spicy

Today, we were at church when I pulled my toddler’s hand out of his pants, and he screamed, "I WAS MAKING MY PENIS BIG!" I need a new church. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 671

You deserved it 462

By Anonymous - 14/09/2018 14:30 - United States - Edinburg

Today, my girlfriend and I hosted a family game night with her grandparents and her father, who was bringing his "friend" who he'd been dating for a couple of weeks. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 093

You deserved it 227

Fun times

By Anonymous - 14/10/2018 22:00

Today, I arrived at the house we rented for my sister's engagement party. I was also told that I have to sleep in the most cramped bedroom with my uncle, who sounds like a mortally wounded warthog when he snores. I paid for the rental. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 051

You deserved it 312

Stuck on amber

By Anonymous - 01/10/2020 07:58 - United States - Greensburg

Today, my wife and mother of my kids said she doesn't want sex. Or a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 307

You deserved it 217

Holy stereotypes, mom!

By BtoTheRtoTheTTK - 19/02/2017 14:00 - United States - Winter Haven

Today, at a mall, my mom accused me of lying about being gay, just because I said I don't like shopping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 235

You deserved it 523

By Mike - 28/02/2019 02:00

Today, my teenage daughter got her driver’s license. Less than an hour later she wrecked my wife’s new minivan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 275

You deserved it 535

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

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Today, I had to use my husband's vehicle. He has been spiraling into a mean, bigoted man. I got into his vehicle and the radio was on a station that was spewing weird stereotypes of women, and making fun of anyone who is not a hard supporter of a certain orange politician/businessman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 600

You deserved it 291

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to put my bra on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 471

You deserved it 7 774

Today, and after my divorce finalised, I ended up falling in love with a 28 year-old woman, meaning that she's 16 years younger than I am. I knew I might be judged for it but man, I was not prepared for the levels of abuse I’d receive from my family, and even strangers, who see us holding hands in public and feel the need to make cruel comments. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 313

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 147

You deserved it 9 985

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend peeing in the cat's litter box. I'm the one who has to clean it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 000

You deserved it 3 910

Today, I woke up from a drunken daze and texted my best friend to take me back to my car. I got confused as to why our messages were green since it was iMessage. Well, come to find out I hooked up with her boyfriend in the bathroom the night before. I should mention I'm a dude, and so is he. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 642