Miscellaneous Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker....

Keastwood013 - 18/01/2013 15:25 - United States

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

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St. Patrick's Day: Shamrocks and Tribulations
Green anecdotes of jealousy, full of shamrocks and pints, for a memorable St. Patrick's Day! …

Wutdafuqq - 23/02/2015 20:18 - Canada - Kanata

Today, a woman yelled at me for holding a door open for her. FML

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Anonymous - 09/12/2009 21:05 - United States

Today, I was going into an office building. There was a boy and a man ahead of me, and the boy held the door open for me. Surprised, I said, "What a nice young man," and he said, "It's OK, ma'am; my dad says to always hold the doors open for old ladies." I'm 43. FML

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Whoops

Anonymous - 28/09/2010 00:44 - United States

Today, I attempted to be nice and hold a door open for a person in a wheelchair. He hit the button to open another door. While I pointed out that I would hold the door for him, I realized that the door I was holding open for him led down some stairs. FML

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Greg - 28/10/2013 21:53 - United States - Livonia

Today, I was leaving the grocery store when an old woman started yelling at me for not holding the door open for her. She accused me of being "everything wrong with the younger generation". It was an automatic door. FML

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Chivalry

Anonymous - 07/11/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, while holding the door open for a stranger, I thought I was being polite. She walked through, smiled at me, and said, "Thanks, but you didn’t have to follow me into the bathroom." I hadn’t noticed the door led to the restroom. FML

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Such a gentleman

Harry123 - 01/09/2024 12:00 - United Kingdom - Swansea

Today, I was trying to be polite by holding the door for an elderly lady in a shop. What I didn’t realise was that the doors were automatic. I ended up standing there awkwardly for a good 5 seconds, holding onto thin air, while she just smiled and walked by. A bloke behind me said, “The doors don’t need your help, mate.” FML

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Anonymous - 11/05/2010 15:04 - Netherlands

Today, an old lady asked me the way to the shopping mall. The shopping mall was not too far away, but I could see that the lady could barely walk so I offered to drive her there. She smacked my car's door into a pole while getting in my car. She didn't even notice that she'd done something wrong. FML

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Alexa, play "Mr Loverman" by Shabba Ranks

Anonymous - 15/03/2020 18:07

Today, I was at a store when I saw a cute girl from my school. Trying to act cool, I went to hold the door for her. Too bad it was an automatic door. FML

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Flattered

Creeped out - 28/01/2013 08:14 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML

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GreenMonstR - 25/04/2009 05:09 - United States

Today, I was at the store with my wife. As we were walking out, I helped an elderly woman get through the door. As I was opening the door, my foot got stuck on the door and my face was catapulted into the woman's breasts. It wasn't until we got into the car that my wife burst into hysterics. FML

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Coop817 19

Friday 18 January 2013 18:50

Hmm weird. That usually works.

SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18

Friday 18 January 2013 18:50

I smell a challenge.

Werken247 14

Friday 18 January 2013 19:24

Give her a bottle of Geritol, let her know you mean business!

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 18 January 2013 19:24

Tell her there's probably room for you and the friends you'd want to invite along.

The_Thinker 18

Friday 18 January 2013 19:29

You've let her through the door. Now you can work on letting the D through her.

itsallbullshit 4

Friday 18 January 2013 19:30

Kids today! Oh, wait...

kaycol 8

Friday 18 January 2013 19:52

Should of asked her how you could then

xRezSynn 15

Friday 18 January 2013 19:53

Werken247 14

Friday 18 January 2013 19:59

pee

twiztedone 19

Friday 18 January 2013 20:01

Granny's still getting it!! Lol! Sorry op! Hopefully you just laughed at it!

PenguinBitch 43

Friday 18 January 2013 20:35

Enlighten us how Noor? How do you get grandma's cookie?

joe502 3

Friday 18 January 2013 20:50

Smooth talker Betty Crocker...

iTag_Skorn 4

Friday 18 January 2013 20:54

Ewwwwww!!

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I went to court to fight my old apartment complex about carpet replacement, because I'd left it completely spotless, only to wait two hours to be told they'd rescheduling it for March. FML

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Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML

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Today, I was colouring countries on a map on my computer whilst listening to music. I was almost done when, whilst swinging my legs to the beat, my leg caught on the computer’s power cord and pulled it out. I was so caught up in the job I hadn’t saved in a while, so all my progress went up in digital smoke. FML

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Today, feeling very self-conscious about my looks, I told my mom I felt ugly and wished I could be as beautiful as her. She only said, "Yeah, I'm pretty, I wonder what happened to you." FML

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Today, my house caught fire and almost burned down. My neighbour, who has always hated me, came up, patted me on the back, and said, "That sucks for you." FML

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Today, a girl I was dating broke up with me for her previous fling. She was scared of committing to a relationship, even though she ended it with him for me. But now she would rather be with this other guy in secret, who is married, and has no plans on being with her for long term. FML

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