Love

By perfectlybrokenx - 24/08/2010 04:21 - Canada

Today, while I was on a date, I noticed my ex-boyfriend in the restaurant, and he looked sad. So I walked over to see him and jokingly said, "You look like your mom died or something!" She had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 801

You deserved it 52 231

By DormHater - 23/08/2010 23:09 - United States

Today, I helped move my current boyfriend into his new dorm room. This would've been fine if I didn't have to do this while avoiding eye contact with my ex-boyfriend, who just happens to be my boyfriend's new roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 294

You deserved it 4 734

Double standard

By Sara1990 - 23/08/2010 11:40 - Australia

Today, I went on a double date with my bestfriend. At the end of the night, her boyfriend gave her a long kiss, and texted her 5 minutes after we left to say he missed her already. My boyfriend picked his nose, then gave me a fist bump as a goodbye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 387

You deserved it 7 019

By Lace - 23/08/2010 04:17 - United States

Today, my husband just told me that he no longer loves me but keeps me around to handle his finances. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 190

You deserved it 3 760

By Nick - 22/08/2010 23:33 - France

Today, I got tased, with the same taser I bought my girlfriend to use on people trying to rob her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 041

You deserved it 8 265

By Squishy - 22/08/2010 23:19 - United Kingdom

Today, my loving boyfriend told me that he wanted to go to the cinema with the girl he loves. The other girl he loves, but don't worry it's "not" a date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 579

You deserved it 3 143

By mollyeyers - 22/08/2010 17:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. According to his Facebook, he had a new girlfriend 16 seconds later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 955

You deserved it 3 526

By lee - 22/08/2010 07:24 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over breakfast. In the afternoon I got to smile at him prettily for hours because he was the photographer in a session neither of us could get out of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 283

You deserved it 3 330

By arace15336 - 22/08/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is only staying with me for the present I promised him for his birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 815

You deserved it 5 128

By jessiegirl - 22/08/2010 03:32 - United States

Today, I called my boyfriend to tell him how sweetly the main character on my favorite tv show proposed to his girlfriend. He told me to hang on a second, and later forgot about me while he told his brother about the hot blonde he slept with last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 259

You deserved it 6 516

By puppielover - 21/08/2010 17:25 - United States

Today, my step-mom informed me that she and my dad will not be attending my wedding because they will be at a NASCAR race. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 013

You deserved it 3 727

By justmylife - 21/08/2010 04:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years called my house even though I was with him at the time. He needed to talk to my mom. He asked her to break up with me for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 774

You deserved it 3 153

By Fml24609 - 20/08/2010 06:20 - United States

Today, I ended up sleeping on the dirty floor because my sister didn't want to share a king size bed with me. She got up to get a drink and stepped on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 791

You deserved it 5 738

By Sara246 - 19/08/2010 23:11 - Canada

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, he asked which girl I'd found out about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 779

You deserved it 3 689

By yup okay - 19/08/2010 15:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he finds his car more attractive than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 002

You deserved it 6 878

By divorced - 19/08/2010 10:01 - United States

Today, my wife put divorce papers in my birthday card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 807

You deserved it 4 571

By mylifeblows - 19/08/2010 06:15 - United States

Today, I found out my husband put a parental block on the TV so I couldn't rent a movie. I'm 42. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 063

You deserved it 8 500

By Single - 19/08/2010 05:26 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He also decided the best way to end our relationship was to kill me and our virtual child on The Sims 3 by setting us on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 488

You deserved it 6 892

By tina - 17/08/2010 12:30 - Canada

Today, I ran into my boyfriend at the mall, the same boyfriend who'd told me he was going on a family vacation to Mexico. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 206

You deserved it 4 111

By Anonymous - 17/08/2010 07:10 - United States

Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 626

You deserved it 4 912

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 955

You deserved it 6 683

By 86145 - 16/08/2010 05:03 - United States

Today, my friends were all sharing sweet things their boyfriends had shared with them. After hearing "he says I look pretty without makeup" or "he promises we'll get married one day", I realized that the only compliment he's given me is that my laughter "sounds like a squirrel having a seizure." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 647

You deserved it 5 678

By crystalpistol - 16/08/2010 02:15 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, right after I turned down an amazing job opportunity in another location, just so I could be with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 926

You deserved it 16 338

By wtf - 15/08/2010 12:52 - United States

Today, I found out that my overprotective parents hired a private investigator a month ago, who since then has been watching my perfectly normal boyfriend, in case he "tries to rape or kill" me. We're both 25 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 359

You deserved it 2 908

Weird flex, but OK

By incestastic - 14/08/2010 23:23 - Canada

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently, my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she's embarrassed of my real brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 512

You deserved it 3 071

By irresponsible - 14/08/2010 20:41 - United States

Today, I missed my shift at work. I had asked my girlfriend, who works at the same store, to text me my schedule. She sent me the wrong hours for today. I got suspended, and she broke up with me for being too irresponsible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 051

You deserved it 8 899

By Chad - 14/08/2010 17:37 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I made lists of what celebrities we're interested in. The first one she listed wasn't a celebrity - it was my brother. He's spending the weekend with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 926

You deserved it 4 087

By Anonymous - 13/08/2010 16:13 - United States

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to hack my Facebook and "like" everybody's statuses. This includes my boyfriend's about his grandmother dying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 349

You deserved it 6 162

By starley - 13/08/2010 09:11 - United States

Today, my husband of 3 years, who I have a 1 year old daughter with, told me he wants a divorce, but who knows, maybe in the future we can "date." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 992

You deserved it 3 461

By brother love - 13/08/2010 05:33 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that the guy I like was only coming to my house to get closer to my brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 785

You deserved it 3 937

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. Ten minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's ass crack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 614

You deserved it 15 275

Today, I asked my students to buy a copy of Anne Frank's diary for an assignment. One of them asked me in all seriousness who wrote it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 232

You deserved it 5 044

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read, "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 160

You deserved it 3 073

Today, I tried to wake my husband up in the middle of the night by kissing him deeply and massaging his neck and shoulders. He opens his eyes, looks at me, says "No", and goes back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 402

You deserved it 15 187

Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 831

You deserved it 76 670

Today, I really really needed to poop. I held it hard. I held it really hard. I pooped my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 204