Kids: Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy...

By Herdad - 30/07/2009 11:34 - United States

Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 070

You deserved it 3 700

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Same thing different taste

Daddy's girl

By TooMuchForToLittle - 06/09/2021 11:00

Today, yet again, my 3 year-old daughter came home from a few hours with her father, screams and cries over everything, and when she realizes it won't get her anywhere, screams at me that she hates me and that she wants to go home. I calmly told her she is home, and she screamed, "This is not home!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 387

You deserved it 204

By jessi - 02/12/2011 13:22 - United States

Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 170

You deserved it 6 677

Mystery man

By LifeSucks - 29/10/2008 11:57 - Canada

Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 755

You deserved it 3 985

Stranger danger

By john doe - 07/12/2013 17:29 - United States - Portland

Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 082

You deserved it 6 212

By numbnuts - 23/09/2013 05:48 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 516

You deserved it 6 063

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 14:35 - Taiwan

Today, I went to pick up my daughter from preschool. When I got there, I ran to give her a hug. She screamed and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 481

You deserved it 4 550

By Anonymous - 06/10/2013 04:44 - United States

Today, my 6-year-old daughter threw a tantrum in the middle of a store, all because I wouldn't buy her a pushup bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 490

You deserved it 7 178

Not now!

By Anonymous - 20/09/2009 05:01 - United States

Today, I was in a department store with my three year old daughter to buy some new jeans. I took her into the dressing room with me and as I began to take off my pants she yells, "Mommy, you can't go peepee in here!!" I am no longer welcome in that particular store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 415

You deserved it 3 867

By BaWanda - 30/06/2014 23:39 - United States - San Diego

Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 558

You deserved it 48 233

By divorced - 07/03/2009 20:15 - United States

Today, I was picking up my daughter from my ex-husband's house and his new girlfriend was there. I said to my daughter that it was time to leave and she clung to his girlfriend and said, "Mommy, I don't want to leave." She wasn't talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151 164

You deserved it 10 457

Bathory_fml 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:22

Just start screaming "I HAVE NO SON! " at the top of your lungs. That'll shut her up. Probably out of confusion, but still.

dzidziaud 5

Thursday 30 July 2009 20:21

Hahaha, that must have been fun. was your visit to the police station pleasant? :]

Comments

xHaniffax 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 21:12

WOW...she's a genius! Keep an eye on her, she's clever...I don't know most 2 year olds that would pull a stunt like that. Really....she's good.

I_Deserved_It 10

Thursday 30 July 2009 21:14

OP... YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 30 July 2009 22:12

LOL. ******* Maury.

decibel_beads 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 21:17

lmao. precocious little tyke - kids these days:-)

bubblybrooke 12

Thursday 30 July 2009 21:58

bratty little child. say 'okay' and walk away. come back in 5-10 minutes and see her in tears. bet she thinks ur her daddy now ;)

austinsbabey 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 21:59

omg lol. i did that when i was 1 and a half when i did that and everyone freaked out. it was so much fun. im smart like that!

batrob 7

Thursday 30 July 2009 22:13

OMFG your kid is a genius. have fun when she's a teenager

rustyrox 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 22:30

how do kids come up with these things? if I were you I would have said well I guess I should get going home then and find my daughter...and start to take off Always worked for me

stlcards220 4

Thursday 30 July 2009 22:30

lol. that sounds like me when i wuz a kid. She'll be a wonderful teenager :)

ithedarkknight 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 22:32

lol sweet you should of just grabbed her and ran out the store. Then when people try to attack you or hit you to let her go. That's when you sue them.

DuhthatsObvious 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 22:51

For all those people saying "Just walk away and leave her there," hello... someone could get him for neglect. You don't do that to your kids. I would personally never let my kids out of my eyesight. It's called good parenting.

paperfox_fml 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 23:49

No one is saying 'drive home and leave her at the shop for 5 hours'. They're saying to start walking away. She'll start screaming and run after him before he's gone 10 steps, guaranteed. And really, you never take your eyes off your kids? Ever? They're gonna have issues when they grow up.

theanonimouse 0

Friday 31 July 2009 11:51

I'm pretty sure they're not advocating leaving the kid in the store and going home. I'd leave the kid there, in the sense that I'd start walking away and maybe wait outside the door. That's what I do with the kids I have to watch, anyway. "Oh, you don't want to leave the park? That's ok, then. Hope the bears don't get you. Bye!" They sure come after that. :)

_THE_MASTER_ 0

Friday 31 July 2009 15:51

yah dude i had to do that with my cousing all the time. keep them in eyeshot and earshot, but once you say something like, 'O.K., get kidnapped and never see me or the rest of the family again,' and start walking, they'll sure as shit follow. they might be yelling and screaming and crying up a storm, but they'll still go with you with less of a fuss and you won't get the police called on you for 'kidnapping' your own kid.