ghoul - 08/03/2011 11:32 Today, I found a dead squirrel under my son's bed. Apparently, he has been keeping it there as a "pet" for the past week. FML 36 867 4 247
Anonymous - 06/03/2011 00:30 - United States Today, while sleeping, I heard an explosion. My neighbor then knocked on my door and informed me that he had just hit my car with shrapnel from a cannon. Not only do I not have a car to drive, but I also have to put this claim on my insurance due to my neighbor being on welfare. FML 33 587 2 703
Randall - 25/01/2011 07:28 - United States Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a tooth and have a cracked rib. FML 41 661 3 434
Lifeguard - 04/04/2009 19:03 - United States Today, I was fired because a patron complained that she didn't like the way I kept staring at her kids. I was a lifeguard. FML 92 576 4 500
For anyone that's following this, the cops were called. I was on the phone with my insurance company due to him not having any kind of insurance. Next thing I know the cops are busting into the building with shields and rifles