KeepCalm007

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NY, NY
38 years-old
Thursday 22 October 1987
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Keepcalm007's favorite FMLs

By Gob - 16/01/2009 14:36 - United States

Today, while waiting for class, I let out a huge fart in front of everyone thinking no one would hear it over the music. I was wearing headphones. FML

agreeclassic 233

vote type 1 333

By strokesie - 03/07/2013 06:56 - United States - Columbus

Today, I had a job interview. All was going well until the interviewer asked me, "So, why should we hire you?" Without thinking, I blurted out, "Because, I'm awesome!" Don't think I'll be getting that one. FML

agreeclassic 41 385

vote type 1 17 923

strokesie app_comment_confession_title

strokesie 23

Wednesday 3 July 2013 20:00

Hey, OP here. After I said that, the interviewer busted out laughing- so there's a plus. She also said something along the lines of "Ya know, nobody says that sort of thing. Usually it's the boring 'I really need a job' type. But not you!" And laughed some more. I really need this job though, I've applied everywhere and this place is the first to call me. I won't know if I got it or not until next week, so I'm crossing my fingers!

Gullible

By anonymous - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Cloquet

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

agreeclassic 56 444

vote type 1 9 815

By Anonymous - 25/06/2013 04:56 - United States - Houston

Today, I used a public restroom. I saw my sister's shoes walk into the stall next to me, so I gave her a little nudge with my foot. We then nudged each other until I walked out and saw a homeless man with the same shoes as my sister. He then tried to hold my hand. FML

agreeclassic 28 637

vote type 1 44 674

By our kids will be derps - 22/06/2013 19:28 - Canada - Nelson

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

agreeclassic 47 493

vote type 1 6 956