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neonpanda44

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Sacramento California, USA
30
Tuesday 25 July 1995

Neonpanda44

I ride quads cuz I'm badass like that, and I fucking hate pink. I'm kick ass on the xbox even though I'm a girl and I don't do fake people stupid shit or drama but I do cuss, sometimes fight if needed and if you have something to say about me, say it to my damn face:P

Neonpanda44 -

Neonpanda44 -

Neonpanda44

lovers5201

KathrinLor...

clara71

orbit

ThisNig

Tamiaxoxo0...

Wondermage

USMC10Rex1...

teotsi

TylerScatd...

KyngJulian

gleave

Neonpanda44

Neonpanda44

Bad advice

Kate - 07/06/2011 07:50 - United States

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

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Classy

Username - 07/06/2011 06:51 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear, "It's not gonna suck itself." FML

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e_edge - 05/06/2011 06:48 - United States

Today, after I successfully blew up a really large balloon, my mom said, in front of my older brother's friends, "Wow, you're going to make some man really happy one day!" FML

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peaaaak - 03/06/2011 10:17 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML

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Size Queen

Anonymous - 11/11/2019 05:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she took the shower head and started spraying my penis with it. I asked her, "What are you doing?" Her response, "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

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