•
•
•

phoneYuNOlisten

0

0

16

161

2722

27

Fort Wayne, USA

Phoneyunolisten

Am I that important to you?

Phoneyunolisten -

Phoneyunolisten -

Phoneyunolisten

lovers5201

AFireInsid...

melloman_f...

Andrew Qui...

JuneMason

rubin8or89

tasher

RainbowGli...

rocker_chi...

CFB_FRS

RandomPers...

chudun

JuneMason

Phoneyunolisten

Phoneyunolisten

schoolgrlstaci - 07/04/2009 20:44 - United States

Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00 pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a field sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test in front of all the students and parents. I blew 0.06. FML

26 047

102 944

Anonymous - 03/07/2013 00:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I came home from a long shift at work to find that my roommate had completely rearranged all of the furniture. Apparently the new arrangement is supposed to improve the feng shui of our apartment. My bed is in the living room. FML

42 338

2 945

Anonymous - 01/07/2013 05:50 - United States - Austin

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

59 820

3 917

The truth

unfortunate - - United States

Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML

50 479

3 245

Anonymous - 22/06/2013 20:55 - United States

Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML

55 775

12 850