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lovers5201

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cancerfreak - 21/03/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, my town had a carnival to raise money for cancer. I ran a kissing booth, when a really cute guy came up paid his $20, looked at me, and said "not even for cancer." He took his money and left. FML

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ANON - 13/08/2013 23:53 - United States - Sacramento

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

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His dark side

JJLight - 27/05/2013 03:14 - United States - Camarillo

Today, I invited my boyfriend to come to an event to meet some of my friends for the first time. I had been raving about him for weeks, and everyone was curious to meet this "amazing guy" I'd been dating. He showed up in a Darth Vader costume because he thought it would be funny to embarrass me. FML

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Furious

Anonymous - 27/05/2013 00:40 - United Kingdom - Maybole

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river that flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

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Better safe

stretchy - 06/05/2013 19:58 - United States - Bethesda

Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML

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