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Excelexcel

Hmmm... Not much to say.. So, I'm not gonna say anything about me.

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Excelexcel

lovers5201

ComaWhiteL...

Excelexcel

Excelexcel

Anonymous - 20/11/2012 17:23 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years-old. FML

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Anonymous - 20/11/2012 01:15 - United States

Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML

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Thanks, I hate it!

poorkids - - United States - Auburn

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

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Kinda offensive

anon - 31/10/2012 04:22 - United States - Medford

Today, my girlfriend and I were going through some troubles in our relationship, and she said to me, "No offense, but I really hope no other relationship I have in the future will be like this one." Some offense taken. FML

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Ghost in the machine

smdh - 22/10/2012 02:52 - United States

Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML

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