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Modern student life sucks

By Dan - 05/03/2021 19:02 - United Kingdom - Warwick

Today, I've paid over £15k a year to have 1.5 years of my 3 year BSc online. All we can do is sit in a tiny room (genuinely worse than Nordic prisons) and watch "online lectures", i.e. paying enormous amounts of money for depression, boredom, loneliness, and information that can be gathered from Youtube or Wikipedia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 180

By Anonymous - 08/07/2019 18:01 - United States

Today, I'm so single, I signed up for a free consultation on an LGBT arranged marriage site. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 434

By Crash44 - 08/07/2019 02:03

Today, my girlfriend and I broke the news to my parents that we're having a baby. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "It's probably not yours." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 055

You deserved it 261

That's not how anything works

By GodHelpMe - 01/06/2022 00:01

Today, my son got fired from work. He took it upon himself to openly insult his boss, and make racial derogatory jokes against a Hispanic coworker of his. He labeled it “freedom of speech” and is gonna “sue for wrongful termination” for “attempt to censor him for having a different opinion.” He’s 28. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 145

You deserved it 306

I'm new to this, sorry

By Fifi - 01/09/2023 06:00

Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 454

They aren't property my dude

By Anonymous - 09/09/2023 14:00

Today, my brother's will left all his wealth to his second wife, while I get left his two kids and a small amount to help cover raising them, because his second wife isn’t mother material. Bitch, neither am I, I love my nieces but I’d go mad if I had to be their new parent. Leave me the money instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 733

You deserved it 283

No more late night beers

By so this is how today is going to go? - 19/06/2022 04:00

Today, I shit the bed. Like, full on shit. I had to go ahead and throw my clothes away. It made it all the way to the mattress. The worst part, it didn’t even wake me up, my alarm did, so I have no idea how long I was sleeping in my own shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 186

You deserved it 346

By Anonymous - 09/08/2019 14:00

Today, I was prescribed two different medications. I was also informed that they will both give me diarrhea for the next two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 611

You deserved it 105

By lapines01 - 12/08/2019 02:00

Today, I went on a date with this really cute guy. We were walking in a park and decided to go on the swings. As I was swinging super high up, I threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 495

You deserved it 349

America! **** yeah!

By Contractor - 20/03/2025 03:00 - United States - Charlotte

Today, and for the past week, I've come to accept that my dad's business is failing. He's used to hiring people willing to work for little pay from a street corner, and now those guys have all but vanished. No "real" Americans want to work for him, even for minimum wage. This country is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 918

Boundaries

By lordoftheweird - 29/06/2022 02:00

Today, I couldn't leave my room because my dad was having a foursome in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 485

You deserved it 153

Are Men OK?

By Anonymous - 02/10/2023 04:00

Today, my boyfriend tried to use the “It’s my birthday” excuse to get access to my booty hole. Last time he used the “My favourite aunt died” excuse, and before that, the night of our fourth date, he used the “I’m drunk and can’t find the right hole” excuse. Take the hint, no means never. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 288

Teenage riot

By Anonymous - 08/10/2023 07:30

Today, my daughter came to me crying because the boy she’s been rejecting for 8 months stopped asking her out, and is now dating someone else. Apparently she secretly liked him and is mad he gave up. That boy dodged a bullet, but I still have to put up with her crazy ass though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 308

Horndog

By Anonymous - 25/04/2021 08:01

Today, despite giving my sister a place to stay while she's in town for a funeral, she demanded I give a bedroom to her son to have to himself, because, "How am I supposed to have 'sexy time' with my husband with him in the room?" Everyone's sharing rooms, and no one's getting sexy time as someone literally died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 666

You deserved it 121

Nice try

By Ellie - 06/07/2022 00:01

Today, I was ringing up a lady’s items; two shoeboxes. Per policy, I’m supposed to open them. She heavily insisted I didn’t. I ignored her and found other merchandise inside. She then went on a rant on how "people should mind their own fucking business" and stormed out of the store without buying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 911

You deserved it 132

Unruly meets incompetence

By Anonymous - 14/10/2023 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was in the library when police arrested me for threatening people. The librarian even told them I did nothing wrong, and that the actual girl they wanted had already left. They took me in anyway. My dad sided with the police and let me “think about what I did” in jail overnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 89

Get out, now

By Hélène - 01/05/2021 10:58

Today, my boyfriend invited me over for dinner for the first time. The place was full of his ex's stuff, books on the shelves, makeup in the bathroom, clothes in the closet and even shoes on the floor. Not to mention creepy plush toys staring at me. She left him 8 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 365

You deserved it 113

Winky

By XxXxXxXxXxXxXxX - 11/04/2025 21:00 - Romania

Today, I was going to have sex with a girl, but when I got my dick out she said, "You got a nice winky." Who the fuck calls a dick a winky unless they're in kindergarten? Felt like I brought home a toddler. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 194

Mixology

By Smokin' drinks - 24/10/2023 16:00 - South Africa - Durbanville

Today, for the 20th time, I poured wine into my ashtray, while the glass was next to it. I also have the bad habit of tipping my ash into my drink. What the fuck is wrong with me? Maybe I should look at what I'm doing instead of the PC screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 1 317

Pigpen

By Anonymous - 22/04/2025 18:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, my husband is furious with me for hurting his daughter’s feelings. Neither he nor his ex make her shower and she smells disgusting! It’s nearly impossible to even sit in the same room with her, as her odor changes the smell of the entire space. All I did was suggest a bath and she cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 657

You deserved it 118

Hyperpoop

By Elongated Muskrat - 17/05/2021 00:01 - France

Today, a friend of mine enthusiastically explained to me how Elon Musk's car-tunnel-thing is supposed to work. I don't know what's worse, the dumbass tunnel or the fact that my friend thinks it's an amazing idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 482

You deserved it 1 079

Get into the groove

By Karen with a C - 01/08/2022 02:00

Today, my fiancé and I went on a tourism boat. There was drinks, food, and a Motown cover band. My man famously has no rhythm, but he’s out on the dance floor and all the guests are loving him. I didn’t dance, and everyone was looking at me like the wet blanket holding him back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 1 187

Bye bye Bambi

By Anonymous - 24/05/2021 19:59

Today, I hit two deer at the same time on my way to work around 50 mph. They jumped out of the bushes last minute, leaving me zero time to react. I waited a full year to get this truck, shopped around to get what I wanted, and it's my "dream truck". I've only had it for two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 061

You deserved it 139

So much winning, Sir!

By FUCK TRUMP - 11/05/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, thanks to that goddamn Trump, my business is going under. All the guys I count on to do jobs have dipped, and hiring new ones will force me to hike my prices through the roof. I'm going to have to cancel three contracts and might get sued. FML

I agree, your life sucks 430

You deserved it 619

The old you, the new me

By Sad and lonely - 13/05/2025 20:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, I spent the day with my ex-husband, getting our house ready for market. We've been doing this for weeks, and to my shock, my ex has turned back into the hard-working, handy, patient man I fell in love with. I don't know what to say or do, so I spend every day quietly heartsick with longing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 296

Addictive

By omfg - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I was introduced to Minecraft. I haven't blinked in 5 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 1 890

Misunderstood

By lildale92 - 03/06/2021 10:01 - United States - Elmhurst

Today, I was trying to explain to my mother-in-law how I hated the way my father-in-law talks to me, the tone he uses. She thought I was attacking him and got mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 272

Angry gamers

By Anonymous - 25/05/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my stupid husband took away my Xbox because he happened to read the game warning that pregnant women should take precautions before playing. I have two months of bed rest left before I give birth and no Xbox. I’ll go mad if I have to just sit and watch TV. I want my Assassin's Creed back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 165

Annie's Song

By David - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Leicester

Today, I was finally having a conversation with my granny, who I don't get to see often. First thing she tells me was that she was going to have surgery soon, because her "women's insides" were "dangling out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 953

You deserved it 391

Road hog

By sin - 01/06/2021 04:01

Today, no matter how hard I try, I just can’t recognize a funeral procession when I see one. It just looks like a bunch of cars to me. I should probably get off the road for good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 357

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I'm so broke that I had to call in sick to work because I couldn't afford to pay my bus fare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 459

You deserved it 5 251

Today, as a police officer, I was sent to deal with an indecent exposure. It was two homeless people who'd both passed out on drugs in the middle of sex. I had to wake them up, then help prise them apart, as his penis was still very visibly inside her exposed for the whole street to see. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 821

You deserved it 186

Today, after I randomly ghosted an ex-friend and blocked her on my social media a few years ago for being too obsessed with Asian culture, I also saw the same girl making out with the same guy I’ve had a crush on the last few weeks. They’ve already started dating as of last night. Karma: 1 Me: 0. FML

I agree, your life sucks 244

You deserved it 1 203

Today, I was at the grocery store when an elderly woman walked up to me and said, "Why can't every guy be as handsome as you?" I would have been flattered by the comment, if I was a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 589

You deserved it 4 788

Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time. I sat in the back, which was a bad idea. When it ended everyone in front of me turned around and stared. When I asked my friend what was going on, she said I had been screaming the Lord's Prayer the whole time. I hadn't even noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 628

You deserved it 26 984

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 041

You deserved it 2 930