The Top

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By Quelestvotreprobleme? - 29/03/2013 09:14 - Turquie - Ankara

Today, I checked in at a hotel, got the keys and went up to my room. However, there seemed to be a problem, so I went back to the front desk. “Excuse me, but there’s already someone in my room!” The reply I got was, “So, what’s the problem?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 50

By FangirlMess6 - 24/03/2017 07:00 - United States

Today, I saw a man stuck in his car door by his jacket. I ran over to help him, and his wife hit me with her purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 851

You deserved it 337

Freaked out

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my son was crying and refusing to sleep in his room because a spider ran along the wall, and it's now hiding somewhere. He’s 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 023

You deserved it 545

By Anonymous - 13/08/2019 20:00

Today, my friend was extremely constipated when he used my toilet. I'm now having to go buy a new toothbrush, because he used mine to dig out his shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 238

You deserved it 168

By "Ohholypuff" - 29/10/2017 04:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with a guy I really liked when he suddenly stopped and, while still inside of me, told me that he didn't "do relationships". FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 844

You deserved it 800

By sadmama - 23/02/2018 15:00

Today, I found out that while my mother-in-law claimed to be babysitting my son, she was actually dropping him off at an unlicensed “day care” in a shady part of town so she could go out. How did I find out? The house was raided by police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 805

You deserved it 348

By radiantum13 - 09/06/2016 02:33

Today, I got yelled at by my supervisor for getting an hour of overtime yesterday. The reason I had an hour of overtime was because that same supervisor made me stay late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 114

You deserved it 1 062

By chickenflavouredlaptop - 09/04/2018 01:30

Today, I received my new laptop in the mail and put it on the kitchen counter, where my family charges all our electronics. My mom then decided to make soup and spilt chicken broth all over my new laptop before I even got the chance to turn it on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 083

You deserved it 1 055

By Nojob - 06/06/2018 09:00 - United States - Bronx

Today, on my way to my job interview, the man who was supposed to be interviewing me slammed into my car because he wasn’t paying attention. He fired me for raising his insurance premiums. I got fired before getting the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 220

You deserved it 207

Quite the doozy

By Anonymous - 07/05/2024 03:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, my wife has moved into the guest room and has been giving me the cold shoulder ever since I asked for a paternity test for our kids. She swears she’s never cheated, so what’s she so offended for? Women make no sense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 1 678

Get out

By Anonymous - 23/09/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to break up with me again, and actually offered me gas money so that I would leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 532

You deserved it 2 045

By LikeAndreTheGiant - 13/02/2017 22:00 - United States

Today, I noticed my doctor has freakishly huge hands. This normally wouldn't have bothered me were I not there for a prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 954

You deserved it 555

By Anonymous - 18/02/2019 18:00

Today, I found myself crying my eyes out over my two favourite fictional characters' deaths. It happened over 6 years ago and has affected me more than real peoples' deaths. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 709

You deserved it 998

By mstannyngdogevr - 28/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Orlando

Today, my fiancé and I moved into a new home a few houses away from our previous one. We were excited about not hearing our roommate's dog howling non-stop anymore. We can hear him from the new house. Very clearly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 968

You deserved it 1 950

Kitchen nightmare

By not chicken spaghetti - 18/12/2016 23:58 - United States - Clarksville

Today, while cooking supper with my boyfriend, we both smelled something funny. He tasted the sauce I was making, then asked me to taste it because something was off. I guess the burned Teflon of our cheap pot mixed with Ro-Tel just doesn't work that well. Now we're having dry chicken and plain noodles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 837

You deserved it 692

By brittney242 - 17/12/2016 10:03 - United States - Stow

Today, while at a night club, I was wearing a brand new outfit that I absolutely loved. I was enjoying myself until I felt something wet drop onto my head and body from above. It was puke from a drunk guy in the V.I.P. section. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 674

You deserved it 651

Soft as snow

By Snow White - 22/05/2017 22:00

Today, I'm so pale that I managed to get a sunburn while sitting in a bus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 066

You deserved it 425

By crazyhair docare - 08/07/2019 16:00

Today, after a lifetime of weaves and extensions, I felt brave enough to wear my natural hair to work. As soon as I clocked in, my manager yelled, “Holy shit! What happened to you? Stick your finger in a socket or something?” I was then sent home for being, “Out of uniform.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 536

You deserved it 311

By ForeverYoung - 17/08/2019 12:00

Today, I got mistaken for a high school freshman. It’s my 23rd birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 252

Bottom line

By strangeprincess - 09/09/2019 16:00

Today, I had to put my cat to sleep after she was in an accident. While I was crying hysterically, the vet asked me for $230. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 909

You deserved it 314

The audacity

By fuckthat! - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Madison

Today, my soon-to-be ex-husband had the audacity to ask if the woman he cheated on me with could be in the delivery room while I give birth to our baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 614

You deserved it 416

By Peach - 05/12/2017 15:00

Today, my husband finally decided to help with the laundry. He washed a pen and it exploded in the dryer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 202

You deserved it 462

By SomeGuyInNY - 16/12/2017 09:00 - United States - Poughkeepsie

Today, I volunteered to tend bar at a friend's charity event. I was called incompetent and had a drink thrown at me for stirring a martini instead of shaking "like they do in James Bond". I've been tending bar for 30 years and have never had a drink thrown at me before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 790

You deserved it 338

By aishahahaha_ - 19/06/2016 00:34 - Zambia - Lusaka

Today, I walked in on my sister and a few of my roommates planning a surprise party for a fellow roommate whose birthday is a week away. My birthday was yesterday. No one remembered. Not even my own sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 827

You deserved it 772

By Fucked4life - 18/04/2018 20:30

Today, I've been dating my boyfriend for 6 years. I've had a really bad week and am feeling depressed, and he knows this. He's also just decided to tell me he has a two-month-old daughter. We do not have an open relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 286

You deserved it 485

By greattt - 10/02/2009 21:15 - United States

Today, I went to get my school picture taken, when the photographer looked at me, saying, "You look like you need a mirror." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 197

You deserved it 3 864

By The Draught of Living Death - 17/07/2018 15:00

Today, I shared an elevator alone with an attractive co-worker. On our way up, she let out a loud, noxious rip. She covered her nose and mouth while giving me an accusing look, as I said with a straight face, "Excuse you." Later, I received a note from HR for harassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 656

You deserved it 285

By [SiMON] - 06/01/2009 09:51 - France

Today, I invited a girl I really like to spend the afternoon at my place. Everything went great... with my sister. They became really good friends, and me, well, I tried to alleviate my boredom in front of my computer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 119

You deserved it 2 878

Lazy comeback

By Anonymous - 17/07/2020 02:01

Today, I was doing my job and trying to teach a lazy bunch of 16-year-olds. A girl entered the room just 15 minutes before class ended, so I snapped, "Someone had better have died for you to be this late!" She immediately burst into tears. Turns out, someone had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 2 749

The haves and the have nots

By geekyteendisaster - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff - United States - Littleton

Today, my crush finally asked me to homecoming. I told my best friend, thinking she would be happy for me. Now we are in a big argument and she won't talk to me because I have a date and she doesn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 596

You deserved it 334

FML on Facebook

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The Top

Today, I was watching TV when a Toy Story 3 commercial came on. My Mom said, "Oh, I remember when I took you to see Toy Story. Now Andy's all grown up and so are you. The only difference is Andy is going to college and you're not." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 229

You deserved it 46 105

Today, whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend, she received a flirty message from her ex on her phone asking if she wanted to go to the cinema. She replied, knowing I could see the screen. The messages were signed with a love heart and about 15 kisses. She claims they are still just friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 015

You deserved it 4 008

Today, I had the choice of visiting a ruined castle or having hot gay sex. I chose the castle. What is wrong with me? FML

I agree, your life sucks 298

You deserved it 989

Today, I was walking to the parking lot from class while texting. When I looked up as I approached my parking spot, I noticed the words "F*ck you Dave" keyed into my car. Hi, my name is Clare. Who's Dave? FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 485

You deserved it 2 259

Today, a customer told my boss I was too pushy because I asked her what bra size she wears. I work at a lingerie store. I got a stern lecture from my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 898

You deserved it 3 497

Today, I found out that if you cry yourself sleep and forget to take off your mascara, your top and bottom lashes will stick together. Leaving you unable to open your eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 575

You deserved it 13 921