Work Wobble wobble - FML

Wobble wobble

Dr.Octopus454 - 07/10/2011 14:58 - United Kingdom

Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Anonymous - 17/03/2010 19:32 - United States

Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML

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Anonymous - 09/07/2013 16:07 - United States - Katy

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

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Dude, seriously?

nuberific - 05/03/2009 18:45 - Canada

Today, I was in the changing room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML

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ouch - 29/02/2012 19:18 - Italy

Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML

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Higgs - 02/06/2009 19:10 - United States

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

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Nice try

klutz - - United States

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

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Anonymous - 18/06/2015 16:56 - Netherlands - Gennep

Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML

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heyyoitsapotato - 31/05/2013 02:35 - United States

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

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spaghett - 29/08/2016 20:32 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, after jumping into a public swimming pool, the female lifeguard, who I have had a crush on for years whistled at me. When I got out of the water, she handed me the bathing suit I'd apparently lost. FML

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Anonymous - 11/08/2009 08:58 - United States

Today, I was at the pool, casually flirting with one of the lifeguards. He said that he would gladly give me CPR, in the event that I needed it. I laughed and thanked him, stating that it was a sweet idea, even though I wouldn't be needing assistance. I then choked on my bottled water. FML

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ollie179 21

Friday 7 October 2011 18:41

Why were you watching his penis wobble then? Look at his face.

that1guy1 13

Friday 7 October 2011 18:38

Nothing wrong with a healthy conversation regardless of clothing.

watagwa 5

Friday 7 October 2011 23:16

HAHA! just stop walking through the changing room.

IPoopedOnU 12

Friday 7 October 2011 23:44

Are u a guy? And y did u look down there

NCSMITH 5

Friday 7 October 2011 23:50

Wait until you get old. What goes around comes around.

natashax21 5

Friday 7 October 2011 23:55

Walk a different way to get to the pool?

bubo_fml 10

Friday 7 October 2011 23:56

"I'd love to chat with you, but your dick's in the way..."

angryyute 4

Saturday 8 October 2011 0:01

And yet.... you allow it to

mjensen23 3

Saturday 8 October 2011 1:59

Lifeguard is one word

justbigbs 6

Saturday 8 October 2011 2:39

Bring shades to work next time

lifeaintsweet 1

Saturday 8 October 2011 3:25

that sucks! unless your gay...if that's the case than you must be in heaven

TipsyHobo 7

Saturday 8 October 2011 3:38

Don't take it for granted. This could be you one day. Pervert. :3

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Today, I found out I have sodium fluoride poisoning. Apparently, my water has a high level of sodium fluorine. I've been drinking much more water lately trying to be healthier. FML

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Today, I confronted my boyfriend after he received a text with a bunch of hearts on it. After arguing, turns out it was from me. FML

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Today, I put the vacuum cleaner hose against my neck to give me a hickey, so that it would look like I got some action. FML

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