Bosses, Relatable, Awkward Work Wage slave - FML

Wage slave

Janet - - United States

Today, my boss called me into his office. I thought I was getting promoted because my sales had been really high lately. My boss shut his door behind me and asked me if I could comb his hair with a lice comb to get rid of his lice. I had to do it to keep my job. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

frustrated - 11/07/2013 04:52 - United States - Antioch

Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML

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Anonymous - 21/01/2016 03:16 - United States - Houston

Today, at my retail job, I tried on one of our hats. My co-worker told me I shouldn't because I could get lice. I laughed it off and told her I didn't believe her. Man, do I believe her now. FML

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The literal smell test

Yudith - 02/12/2024 06:00 - Canada

Today, my boss held his polo shirt one inch from my nose and asked me to smell it. He said that he was going into one of our tenants' apartment and wanted to smell him before and after so I could judge said apartment's cleanliness. FML

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imalilangel05 - 10/02/2009 15:08 - United States

Today, I was tutoring kids at an elementary school. One kid messed up my hair. I said, "Why'd you do that??" He said, "I have lice, now you have lice too!" FML

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AnonUser464 - 08/01/2013 16:40 - United States

Today, my boss called me over to his office; he wanted me to fire four hardworking employees. One of them was the girl I was going to ask out. FML

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hcfan - 14/04/2009 11:18 - Australia

Today, a customer came in to the Pizza store where I work and complained that the food they had purchased had a strand of black hair in it. After some deliberation, my boss decided to fire me. He is the only staff member there with black hair. I shaved my hair 2 weeks ago. FML

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Anonymous - 14/11/2012 18:10 - United States - Gerber

Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML

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poisonhand - 14/01/2009 15:32 - United States

Today, a co-worker asked me if I had a comb he could borrow. I'm bald. FML

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Genius

joshua - 25/01/2010 21:24 - United States

Today, I got a call from my younger brother's school to pick him up immediately. He had a test today, but he had the brilliant idea that by telling everyone he had head lice, he could go home. I had to leave work to pick him up, and now I have to take him to a doctor so they can see if he can go back. FML

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The Dilbert Principle

Anonymous - 14/06/2017 16:00

Today, my boss called me into his office. I've been working hard doing extra work so I can get promoted. He called me in to tell me I'm to reliable in my current position, so I won't be moving up. FML

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deadlyill 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 20:15

just so you know that is illegal for some one in power to make you do something such as that

drybamboo 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 20:09

His name's Michael Scott, isn't it.

Your_Shadow 0

Sunday 15 March 2009 15:17

You probatly have lice to now.

anynonymous_fml 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 3:30

I would seriously just quit. No job is worth that much trouble, not even in this economy

urkiddingrite 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 6:02

thats when you QUIT your job, moron

allie2590 31

Friday 27 March 2009 0:12

He can't do that.

c3ns0r3dn4m3 0

Thursday 25 June 2009 15:49

at least it wasnt his pubic hair....

Avenging_Angel 0

Friday 10 July 2009 12:10

Ewww... I'm pretty sure that's not in the job description at all. Yuck >.<

Vetrina 0

Monday 28 September 2009 2:24

Ewww... at least you kept your job.

frocher 0

Saturday 2 January 2010 11:08

Is your boss Richard Branson or something?

Anteezy 7

Monday 18 January 2010 15:37

He can't force you to do things like that.

WONDERWB 2

Monday 1 March 2010 7:09

That's illegal and regardless of your genders can still fall under sexual harrassment. Turn him in.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I drank water from a random, half-full water bottle I found inside a bumper car (AKA dodgems) at the local fairground, thinking it was mine. It wasn't. FML

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Today, I finally landed a new job, and thinking he would be proud, I told my boyfriend. Instead of congratulating me, he got mad that my work hours include Saturday, his laundry day. FML

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Today, my boyfriend and I are still fighting over the fact I haven't told my overprotective, bipolar, narcissist father about us, after a month together. Neither of us wants to break up, but we can't come to a compromise either. Dating is hard. FML

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Today, the seemingly normal guy I've been dating for a while told me he is a wolf spirit in a human body to bridge the gap of his ancestors and humans. What?! FML

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Today, I found out that when my neighbors throw a party, it includes guests having sex in my garage, and relieving themselves on my lawn. FML

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Today, I finally found a way to lesser the loneliness in my life. During at least one work or school zoom meeting a day, I "pin" a random female attendee's screen. That way, I can pretend we're staring into each others eyes the whole time. FML

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